Breakfast. It was one of the most fulfilling concepts in life. Imagine starting your day by stuffing enchiladas in your mouth. Pure joy! So I did the usual when I woke up that day, I headed to the kitchen. My journey to the kitchen was interrupted by multiple bouquets of roses arranged in the most perfect way ever. Climbing roses, English roses, Floribunda roses, Ground cover roses, Grandiflora roses, polyantha roses you name them. They were all sitting tight in their bouquets, staring at me, waiting for me to pick them up. I knew they were meant for me the moment I laid my eyes on them. Oh, there was a card! I picked it up from one of the bouquets.
Dear mine,
You're amazing.
Love, yours
It read. Carlos was the ultimate lover boy. "Love is in the air," my nanny sang as soon as she noticed me hovering over the flowers with the card in my hands. "Just give the guy a chance already. He's trying," she added. "Yeah, maybe it's time I faced my fears," I agreed with her. "It will work out, right?" I asked her and I hoped to hear a 'yes' but I didn't. "Only one way to find out," she said instead. "You know you should take your chances with Xavi," I said and no, it wasn't one of my many jokes. I meant it. "Please don't ever bring that up," she said instead and I nodded. "I'll get Bolivar to help you with your flowers," she said as she exited the living room and I decided to call Carlos. "Hey beautiful," he greeted me as soon as he picked up but it came out as a flirt. One of Carl's many charms. "Flowers, huh?" I asked. "Did you like them?" He asked. "I loved them," I said. "Are you free tonight? We could find something fun to do," I said nervously. I was asking him out again! "Of course, I'm free tonight," he stated, not hiding the ecstasy in his voice. "Pick you up at 8:00?" He asked.
"No, I'll pick you up," I said. "Alright, I love that," he said. "I'll get back to work now," he said. "Okay, see you then. And Carl, you are amazing too," I remembered to add that last line before hanging up. That guy was going to turn my whole world upside down.
***
It had been a long day of working on paintings. It was the only way to not think of drugs and Carlos too much. But mostly Carlos. My phone rang just before I could pick my outfit for my date with Carlos. Unknown number? I knew not to pick those. It rang again and I immediately felt like I knew the caller. "Hello," I spoke as I tapped my foot nervously because he hadn't called in forever. Something was amiss, I figured. "Eva, it's me, "Fabian spoke at the other end of the line. His voice was so shaky, he sounded so frightened. "Are you okay?" I asked, the tension in my voice unable to be masked. No response. It was him breathing so hard at the other end of the line. "Faby, talk to me," I urged him but it came out as a plea. "I'm not okay," He finally said in a cracking voice. I bet he was crying because that was the only time his voice got raspy. "Where are you? Do you want me to come over?" I asked. "I'd love that," he whispered. "Same place where I brought you last time," he added.
"I'll be there," I said and hung up, threw on black cargo pants and a mustard hoodie, then headed to the parking lot. And yes, I was going to drive there in Xavi's car. I pulled up outside his house and quickly made my way into his house. There he was, seated on the floor of his living room with a gun in his hand. It seemed like he had reached out for it when he heard me open the door. "Hey, it's okay. It's just me," I reassured him and proceeded to kneel next to him. I looked into his eyes and had never seen a man so broken that it showed in his pupils. He was drained of energy and life. I put my arms around him and hugged him so tight like it was the last hug we were ever going to share. "My mum...," he started. "She died on a day like today," he said and it finally made sense. It was his mum's death anniversary. "I'm so sorry Faby, I wish there was something I could do to help," I whispered in his ear. "You are here, that counts," he said.
"I killed my mom, I killed her," he cried out and it hurt my soul to see him like that. I wished I could tell him that everything would be alright, that the pain would pass, but I didn't know that for sure. I did not want to sign up as False Hope's ambassador. "Enough crying, drink with me," he broke off our embrace and offered me some liquor. "Drinking is not my scene," I said. "Smoke with me then?" He switched up his offer as he reached for two Casa Turrent cigars from the base of the glass table. I should have said no but I willingly took the cigar from his hand. He lit the cigars and we smoked away, more like smoking our sorrows away or him smoking his sorrows away and I being the supportive friend. "That was my second time smoking you know," I laughed about it as I lay on the floor, staring at the ceiling that now seemed to be dancing before my eyes. "Really?" He expressed his shock as he positioned himself beside me. "Yeah, pills are kind of my thing," I said. "I'll get some pills then," he said. "Cool," I agreed. He made a call from his burner phone and some guy showed up with the pills ten minutes later. He looked like one of the guys that worked for his dad "That was fast, let me see what you got here!" I marvelled. The next thing I knew, I was popping some oxycodone and was feeling as high as a kite. "She didn't get a proper burial. No one even knows she died," Faby cried. "Holding on to that secret is just sickening," he mumbled. "Where was she buried? We could visit her grave if you want to," I suggested. "Perhaps give her a proper burial, "I added and that was enough proof that I was so high on drugs. "Really?" He sounded astonished. I nodded. "I meant it when I said I was all in," I assured him. And off we went to do some grave digging.