Damn, I'm finally back. Sorry for just disappearing like that out of nowhere. Had some personal stuff going on, including fucking up my arm and being unable to write properly for a while (I'm fine now). Rest assured, I haven't dropped this fic. I'll try to get back into the routine of updating, but I can't say for certain how often it will be for now.
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"-To slay a mighty dragon, because it was his pest." Melodious and somewhat slurred words spilled out of the mouth of a white-haired elf.
The crowd of adventurers cheered and raised their glasses while stomping and clapping in tune with the rhythm, while the waitresses ran around delivering orders while shooting the elf amused looks.
"A strange little man came forth to request a deft assist." The song continued with the elf jubilantly playing a lute provided to him by Anya.
Cassian never expected to end up drunkenly singing in a bar to an audience of adventurers, but he was too drunk to care.
Apparently dismissing Mia's alcohol wasn't the wisest thing to do, as the ticked-off Dwarf, announced that the arrogant elf would be getting so drunk he wouldn't even remember his own name by the end of it.
"But the Witcher was quite reluctant; the story had a twist!"
So, Mia proposed a bet. If she failed to get him drunk by the end of the night, Cassian's bill would be waived and he could dine at the Hostess for free for a month. On the other hand, if he did get drunk, he'd have to pay double the bill he racked up for the alcohol he consumed.
Emboldened by his displayed tolerance, as well as not wanting to be folded in half by a retired level 6, he confidently accepted the challenge.
"The Golden One with the golden rules; two warrior belles with all the tools!"
It started out well. Mia gave him the strongest alcohol she sold in copious amounts, and Cassian drank it all like water to the baffled looks of the patrons and waitresses. Even Mia did not expect the elf to actually back up his bragging.
"More dazzling than all the jewels; oh, they showed us we're all fools!"
He should've known to quit while he was ahead, but no, instead he had to provoke the dwarf and ask her if that was the best she got. So, Mia retreated back to her basement storage and brought out a barrel of her strongest drink.
Apparently, it was Rum she brewed herself by distilling a plant found on the lower floors of the Dungeon. The sinister smile she wore as she poured him a pint sent the first shiver of regret and uncertainty through Cassian.
"They showed us we're all fools; oh, we're just fools!"
By Mia's own admission, The Rum was strong enough to knock out a third-class adventurer in just one glass, and second-class adventurers only fared slightly better.
"The old little man fell swiftly, off a cliff and to his death."
That's how Cassian ended up drunk out of his mind and putting on a musical performance as he stumbled around the bar.
"We sadly mourned the loss; Though we'd witnessed his last breath."
The room spun in Cassian's vision as the rowdy cheers and melodies created a chaotic, but pleasant, environment, while he continued with his song.
"They showed us we're all fools; oh, we're just fools!"
Cassian finished with a flair and bowed as the bar erupted in cheers, whistles, and laughter.
"Thank you, thank you, you have been a wonderful audience!" He laughed with them, before going back to the bar and flopping down the chair out of breath, as the crowd started settling down.
"Nyaa, that was amazing!" Exclaimed Anya as he was quickly surrounded by the waitresses of the hostess.
"I agree, that was a great performance." Lunoire added with a smile.
Syr on the other hand had stars in her eyes as she started hopping around Cassian. "That was awesome! I didn't know you could sing Cassian! And so well too! I've never heard of that song; did you write it?"
"Ah no, it was a song about a certain Witcher back where I came from." The famous tale about Geralt hunting a dragon.
"Witcher? What's that?" Chloe tilted her head to the side.
"It was the title for monster hunters back there. People who took it upon themselves to kill dangerous monsters threatening the civilians. I'm one of the Witchers too, although I've left that place behind and come to become an adventurer here."
"It appears you were a bard as well considering your little show. Didn't know you had it in you elf!" Mia laughed boisterously.
"Heh, had some music training back home, never was too invested into it though. Sorry about the mess, by the way, got the crowd a bit too riled up." He apologized as he looked around and saw the spilled food and drinks from when people started dancing.
"Hahaha, don't worry about it. Thanks to you all of them started ordering even more drinks, so we'll be making a good profit tonight. Huh, maybe I should hire you as a bard." Mia got a thoughtful face.
"Hah! You can't afford me dwarf."
"Oh, is that so? I would've thought you would be desperate for some money considering what awaits at the end of the night." Mama Mia grinned evilly as she slammed down another full mug of Rum.
"Ugghhh…" Cassian paled and groaned as he eyed the mug apprehensively. He was already quite drunk, as he saw multiple Mias standing in front of him. He knew he had lost the bet and already dreaded the hefty bill he would be slapped with by the end, as well as the coming hangover on the morrow.
"Bottoms up, pretty boy! You're not off the hook yet. I'll have you stumbling into walls before this is over!"
Cassian picked up the mug and started drinking regretfully as Anya patted him on the shoulder in sympathy. "There, there, nya. Should've known better than challenge Mama. Oh, I know! Why don't we have a singing duet? We can sing the next song together!"
Cassian raised an eyebrow at the offer, while not noticing all the other waitresses going pale and adopting fearful expressions at the prospect.
Cassian smiled and thought it would be fun, so he decided to accept, but before he could, Mama Mia quickly came to the rescue and slammed her hand down on the counter, making everyone jolt.
"That's enough slacking around out of you bunch, now get back to work, before I tan your behinds!" She shouted, making the girls yelp in fear and quickly scramble to resume their work, although the expression of relief was evident on their faces.
Then Mia turned to Cassian and lowered her voice so that the others wouldn't overhear. "Never accept Anya's offer regarding singing, got it?"
"Huh? Why's that?"
"Because she's the most tone-deaf person I've ever seen. Her singing will make you want to dig a hole and hide away, just to make it stop assaulting your ears."
"Uhh, that's a bit mean, don't you think? It can't be that bad."
"Boy, I've seen her make people and horses faint from hearing her sing." She said with a deathly serious tone, showing Cassian that she wasn't joking one bit.
'Making people and horses faint? What kind of ludicrous abomination would one have to release from their mouth to achieve that?' Cassian couldn't help being stunned and befuddled but still nodded at the proprietress.
"Good, now get back to drinking, we still get some time ahead of us!"
'Damn it…' Cassian cursed himself for putting himself in this situation.
"Ca-ssi-an!" Syr drawled out his name playfully and came up to him, sitting down next to his seat.
"Didn't I tell you to get back to work?!"
"Mamaa, all the orders are served, let me take a small break, pleaseee?" She stared at Mia pleadingly, even making her lower lip quiver to win her over."
"Tch, fine. 10-minute break, after that no more slacking off!" She relented.
"Yaay! So, Cassian, how have you been doing as an adventurer? You even bought a manor, right? That's so quick."
"You already purchased a place to stay at? Was your goddess loaded?" Mia seemed surprised.
"Not really, no. We've been earning pretty well in the dungeon, so we had enough to afford it. Sort of?"
"Sort of? And that's still awfully quick. You and yours must be pretty good."
"We got lucky and managed to catch a Jack Bird. That gave us a nice, big budget to spend."
"Jack Bird? I've heard that you need to be level 3 to catch up to one, how did you manage it?!" Syr exclaimed.
"Lured it into an ambush and a trap. After immobilizing it, it was a simple matter of just grabbing it."
"Impressive, better than the idiots that keep thoughtlessly chasing it at least. That should've afforded you a nice, cozy mansion, if not a particularly big one."
"Oh, it is a big one. Quite so in fact. We got lucky with that too, apparently, the previous owner needed to quickly sell it off for some reason, so we got it for an extremely cheap price. Don't know what happened, but I'm grateful for the opportunity." Cassian decided to indirectly say thanks for that incident and sure enough, when he glanced over, he could see the self-satisfied smirk on Syr's face.
"Off to a good start, eh? Well, that only means more celebration!" Mia refilled his mug with more Rum.
"Oh, come on…" Came the slurred whine from Cassian as he stared at the once more, full mug with despair.
"No use whining about it now, elf. Shouldn't have run your mouth when you did. Now suck it up, and drink your fill!" Mia laughed happily, looking forward to this night's end, as the elf regretted his words.
"Sure, laugh it out. It's not as if you're the one that has to down an entire barrel of liquid death."
"Hey! I will tolerate no smack talking about my Rum. I'll have you know, it was brewed to absolute perfection!"
"If you're trying to kill someone that is. Who in their right state, except me, would even be able to drink this stuff seriously and not fall over."
"Oh? Just because you've got a little tolerance for booze, doesn't mean you're special. I drink this stuff as my past time fruit juice."
"Pft, yeah right." This thing was strong enough to punch through his Witcher tolerance. The same tolerance that allowed him to drink other strong, alcoholic beverages as if they were water.
"Oh, is that disbelief I'm hearing, rookie?"
"I'll believe it when I see it." As he downed yet another mug.
"Is that so? Fine then, you're too far gone now, so let's leave it up to next time. We're going to have a drinking competition with this same Rum, the first to pass out loses and owes the winner a favor. And don't think you can weasel your way out of this little elf. I've been wanting someone who could at least put up a fight before I put them to sleep!" Mia grinned viciously.
…
'Why do I keep talking?' Cassian cursed his fat mouth for not knowing when to shut up. "Agh, fine! I'll have you eat your own words, dwarf. We'll see how you like it when I have you keel over in your own bar!"
If he's so deep into it, might as well jump head-first fully in. And Mama Mia answered him in kind with a laugh promising pain.
The night continued like that, Cassian drinking more and more while talking with the waitresses from time to time, mostly Syr though. He even exchanged some words with Ryuu, but she seemed mostly reserved, though he could feel her gaze on him. Especially when Syr was with him.
'Maybe she's scoping me out for danger I might pose to Syr?'
Finally, when Cassian could barely hold his head up, as the world was fully blurry around him, Mia came over and announced his defeat, before slapping down his bill in front of him.
Cassian had to squint to see what was on the paper properly, but once he did, he felt as if he was sucker punched by an orc, his already fragile state no longer able to take the mental damage as well, promptly passed out.
The last thing he heard was someone's despaired gasp before the world darkened around him.