"Minna-san, has anyone played UNO before?" Fujiwara Chika suddenly burst into the student council room with a flourish, holding up a colorful box like it was some kind of treasure chest. "It's suuuuuper fun! Today's lunchtime activity is this~!"
Of course she came prepared. Natsukawa Kanade wasn't surprised anymore. She always had something up her sleeve when she visited during break time—and by now, everyone knew her version of "work" usually meant "game time." Today's target was clear: victims for a new card game session.
But when he saw what it was, Kanade gave a small nod of relief. UNO, huh? Thank Kami-sama it wasn't another bizarre prototype from the game development club she sometimes freelanced with. The last one had haunted them all for a week straight—he still had flashbacks to "Slap Your Feelings!!: Deluxe Edition." Never again.
"I'm down. Let's just say it's part of my post-lunch cool down," Kanade replied casually, stretching a little before settling into a relaxed sitting position. He'd already wrapped up most of his tasks for the day, and honestly, he had nothing better to do.
"I'll join too," Kaguya Shinomiya responded, nodding in that composed, noble way of hers. If the president agreed, of course she would follow. She wouldn't admit it out loud, but part of her looked forward to these dumb games now. They'd become a kind of chaotic routine.
"Um…" Iino Miko hesitated, caught mid-step toward the sofa.
On one hand, the student council room was a sacred space. Playing casual games here, especially during school hours, made her feel like she was doing something wrong. There wasn't even a convenient excuse like "It's for the welcome party!" this time… But on the other hand, the friendly warmth in the room—friends chatting, laughter bouncing off the walls—was hard to resist.
Before her hesitation could solidify, Fujiwara had already made her move.
"Come on, Miko-chan~ Just one round, ne? It's so fun! The rules are crazy easy!" she cooed, sliding next to Miko like a clingy cat, arms already half-around her.
"A-ah… well… if senpai insists…" Iino Miko stammered, cheeks faintly pink. Fujiwara's unexpected body contact was disarming, to say the least. Though she admired the secretary's energy and charm, it always caught her off guard. Where was the graceful, poised upperclassman she once idolized?
Is this what they mean by, 'you only discover a person's true self once you get close'…? Miko thought to herself, then glanced sideways at Natsukawa Kanade.
Despite everything she'd heard about him before joining—the rumors, the teasing—he had turned out to be surprisingly normal. Serious, even. Reliable. And from what she had seen lately, he didn't flirt or get too close to any one girl. In fact… had she misjudged him entirely?
"Miko-chan~? Hellooo?" Fujiwara waved her hand in front of her face. "Daijoubu?"
"Ah! I-it's nothing…" Miko blinked back to reality, shaking off her inner monologue. "Actually, I've never played this before. Can you teach me the rules?"
"Me neither," Kaguya added flatly, arms crossed, but with an ever-so-slight gleam of curiosity in her eyes.
EHHHHHHHHHH?!" Fujiwara looked like she'd just heard they didn't know what pizza was. "You guys haven't even heard of UNO?! Are you guys from, like… the Edo period?!"
"That's going a bit far," Kanade deadpanned. "There are plenty of people who don't play card games. Besides, I've played before."
"Souka~?" Fujiwara leaned in, eyebrows raised. "Wait, wait, wait… Are you talking about, like, online games? Random matchmaking?"
Kanade froze.
Fujiwara didn't stop. "You don't even know their names, do you? Just 'BlueDragon333' or something like that?"
"…"
"Pfffft, I knew it!" she giggled. "And you call those friends?"
"They are friends!" Kanade huffed. "They don't lie to you, don't get mad if you win too much, and you can play games together in perfect harmony. Isn't that the dream?!"
"Apologize to all the real friends out there~" Fujiwara teased, sticking out her tongue.
"Tch… fine! You wanna play or not?" Kanade shot her a half-glare, half-smile. "If you keep clowning around, I'm going back to class."
"Yamete, yamete~ okay okay, I'll behave!" she laughed.
With a dramatic flourish, Fujiwara placed the deck on the table.
"Since most of you are UNO-virgins, allow me to teach you, ne~"
"At the start of the game," Fujiwara Chika continued, hands gesturing dramatically like a magical girl explaining her special move, "one person plays a number card of any color. Then the next person plays a card that matches either the color or the number. It goes on like that, in a circle!"
She spoke with such confidence that it felt like she was delivering an important battle strategy.
"These are called the color-limited number cards. They're the most basic—and the most common," she explained, holding one up like it was a divine artifact.
"But there's more! Two other card types bring the spice! Function cards also have specific colors but can do cool stuff when played—like the 'Skip' card. Use that, and the next player just... poof... misses their turn. Or the 'Reverse' card—it flips the direction of play. The last one is the 'Draw Two'—if you play it, the next poor soul has to draw two cards and skip their turn."
A dramatic gasp escaped from Iino Miko. "So cruel!"
"But wait! There's more!" Chika's eyes sparkled like a mischievous kitsune. "Wild cards! These beauties come in two flavors. One lets you change the color to anything—super flexible! The other is the Wild Draw Four card. Not only do you pick a color, but the next player has to draw four cards. It's the ultimate secret weapon!"
Kaguya blinked. "That sounds... unbalanced."
"Exactly!" Fujiwara gleamed. "That's why it's fun!"
"Also!" She wagged her finger with a flourish. "Basic rules: If you're down to your last card, you must say 'UNO!' or you'll get penalized—draw one extra card and lose your turn. If you can't play a card, you draw one from the deck. If it matches, you can choose to play it—or not. Oh, and wild cards count too. But remember: you can't win the game with a wild or function card! You have to end on a number card. That's justice!"
"Makes sense…" Kanade—correction, Natsukawa-senpai—nodded thoughtfully from his corner, arms crossed like a samurai hearing a rival's battle plan.
Chika paused. A little too long.
She was getting carried away. The excitement of laying out the rules... it felt like explaining a secret family technique. But her opponents were all newbies. If she dropped the full scroll on them at once, they'd be overwhelmed—and probably bail.
Which would ruin her true plan.
After all… where was the fun in winning if your enemies ran away before battle began?
So, she reined it in with a sheepish cough. "Ahem! There are more advanced rules, like stacking and counter-challenges, but let's keep it simple for now. Otherwise, I might scare off you poor kouhai-tachi."
Yuuji's shoulders relaxed, visibly relieved. "Phew… I was starting to think this was some kind of exam."
"Let's just play a round!" Chika clapped her hands cheerfully. "You'll learn faster by doing. Ne?"
The group exchanged looks. Then…
"I'm in." Natsukawa Kanade leaned back in his chair. "I'm curious to see how this turns out."
"No objections here," added Kaguya.
"Y-Yes… I'll try too." Yuji hesitantly raised her hand, though she still looked like she might run if things turned too intense.
"Okay then—ground rule time!" Kanade suddenly narrowed his eyes at Chika. "No cheating. UNO is sacred."
"Baka!" Chika puffed up her cheeks in protest. "Don't lump me in with those shady game show villains. I'm a noble card master!"
But Kanade wasn't buying it. He knew this girl's track record—and her face was already giving off "evil strategist" energy.
Still, she was so confident in her abilities that cheating felt unnecessary.
Once they decided turn order by drawing the highest card, the battle began.
Fujiwara Chika took the first spot.
Iino Miko followed, then Kanade.
It started innocently enough—each player drew seven cards, and the game proceeded in clockwise rotation. The first few rounds passed smoothly, with simple color and number matches. Even Miko began to relax, smiling faintly as she placed her second card.
But then—the third round—disaster struck.
Kaguya hesitated, then sighed. "I have no matching card."
She reluctantly drew from the deck.
"Oh no…" Miko whispered. The first casualty of card fate.
Then the tempo shifted. One by one, cards flew. Reverse. Skip. Draw Two. The sacred circle of play became chaotic. Like a magic circle spinning faster and faster, it threatened to consume the unprepared.
Then suddenly—
"UNO!" Chika declared triumphantly, slamming a wild card onto the table like a shounen hero delivering their finishing move.
"Color change—yellow!"
Everyone's gaze locked onto her.
In her hand—only one card remained.
She almost didn't say "UNO," hoping someone would forget and she'd catch them on a technicality. But under Kanade's suspicious gaze, she knew she couldn't risk it.
She sent him a smug grin.
"You thought I'd fall for that? I'm not that careless, senpai~"
Kanade scowled slightly. "Hmph."
Fujiwara Chika looked at Kanade with a glint of triumph in her eyes, as if she'd already secured victory.
Heh. With so many cards piling up in his hand, he looked less like a student council president and more like a card-hoarding salaryman desperate to pay his bills. Compared to the solitary card sitting smugly in her hand, Kanade's unlucky streak couldn't have been more obvious.
"Hmph! So even the great president isn't that great, huh?" Chika giggled internally, already savoring the taste of sweet, sweet victory.
But the universe, as always, had a cruel sense of humor.
Just when she thought she had the game in the bag, Kanade calmly, even coolly, placed a Wild Draw Four card onto the table.
Her smug smile cracked like a brittle cookie.
"Eh?! Are you that desperate to stop me from winning the first game?! That's a bit petty, President!" she cried out, dramatically placing a hand on her chest like a wounded heroine.
But then her eyes narrowed like a cunning fox. "I call Challenge! There's no way you don't have a red card in all those cards!"
She jabbed a finger at him, the tip practically sparking with suspicion.
Without flinching, Kanade calmly fanned out his cards in front of her like a professional magician.
Not a single red in sight.
"…Eh?"
"Challenge failed. Please draw four cards, Fujiwara-san," he said with the elegance of a kabuki actor, gesturing toward the deck like a polite villain.
Fujiwara Chika was stunned. Betrayed. Emotionally devastated.
How could he, with a mountain of cards, not have one red card?! This was an assault on reason itself!
"Aaaaahhh~! Yamete kudasai~!" she wailed internally, reluctantly drawing four shiny, new punishment cards.
This was an unforgivable offense. A brutal injustice. She, the game goddess Fujiwara Chika, toppled by a combo of sheer luck and cold composure.
Unacceptable.
Her vengeful heart burned brightly. She would have her revenge, even if it meant summoning every drop of karma in the room!
Unfortunately, revenge required luck—and everyone's luck seemed cursed tonight.
Even when someone neared victory, the whims of the deck would drag them back down. It was like trying to climb out of a pit while the walls kept crumbling beneath your fingers.
Still, she bided her time.
Then, it happened.
A shining opportunity revealed itself in the form of a Reverse card. She slapped it down dramatically, the energy of a thousand anime rivals burning behind her.
The flow of the game flipped direction—and just like that, her next target became Kanade once more.
Perfect.
In her hand sat a beautiful, dangerous Draw Two card. Her fingers tingled with excitement.
"Kukuku… Let's see you suffer, Mr. President," she murmured, unable to contain the sparkle in her eyes.
After Iino Miko played her turn, Chika swooped in like a hawk, slamming the +2 card down with flair.
"Draw Two! HA! Eat that!" she declared, pointing at him as if sentencing him to a thousand years in the shadow realm.
She practically tilted her nose upward in triumph, giving him a full view of her victory pose.
But…
Kanade blinked once, then silently placed another Draw Two—of a different color—right on top.
"Draw Two, next," he said smoothly, like a boss delivering bad news during a board meeting.
"Ack—!"
Chika's gloating expression froze.
From beside him, Shinomiya Kaguya hesitated for only a moment before saying sweetly, "Ara, I believe I have one too."
She delicately laid down another +2 card, joining in on the carnage with a soft smile.
She'd had it all along but had felt too guilty to target the president. But now, with things heating up, even she couldn't resist joining the combo train.
Iino Miko stared at the growing pile of doom.
"…Then I'll use this!" she said, her voice edged with regret.
She threw down her only non-number card—a Wild Draw Four.
"…"
Fujiwara Chika's soul left her body.
She had nothing left. Not a single card to reverse the tide. Her grand plan had backfired with the elegance of a falling brick.
Eight. Eight cards.
That's how many she had to draw now.
She sniffled. Her pride lay in tatters.
"Kami-sama… why…?"
Fujiwara Chika's face crumpled like a defeated anime villain after the final boss battle. Her triumphant aura vanished in an instant, replaced by bitter tears and a trembling pout.
"Uuuu~ this can't be happening..." she whimpered softly, as she helplessly pulled card after card from the draw pile. Her once-sleek hand ballooned into a mountain of misery—far surpassing everyone else at the table. She had become a walking, talking card factory.
A "big family," indeed. Too big.
But even before she could shake off the sting and prepare for a dramatic comeback, the final blow landed—unexpected and merciless.
"I-I'm out!" Iino Miko exclaimed with a surprised little jump, placing her last card down.
For a heartbeat, silence filled the room.
"…Eh?" Chika blinked in confusion.
"Ah… I forgot to say UNO," Iino added with a sheepish giggle, covering her mouth. "Gomen, I got a little excited…"
At the same time, she innocently revealed the color of her final card without even realizing it, her cheeks slightly flushed. A total amateur move.
"Ara ara, that's technically a rule violation, right?" Kaguya said gently, tilting her head in thought.
But Kanade, ever the stoic rules lawyer, raised a hand to clarify. "No, it's still a valid win. The rule is that you must say UNO when you're down to one card. If no one catches you before you finish, then it doesn't count against you."
He looked toward Fujiwara Chika. "I was watching her the whole time, so if anyone forgot the rules, it was… you."
Fujiwara's face twitched.
Et tu, Kanade?!
Meanwhile, Kaguya gave a small sigh, glancing at her remaining two cards. "So close. If my luck had been just a little better…"
Still, she offered a graceful smile and said, "Omedetou, Iino-san."
Truly, the elegance of Shinomiya Kaguya never faltered—even in defeat.
But contrast that with Fujiwara…
"Uwaaaah, Miko-chan, you're amazing!" Chika suddenly wailed, throwing herself at Iino like an overly affectionate mascot character. "Your first game and you already won! You're so talented, my adorable kouhai, rub rub rub—!"
Her dramatic transformation from sore loser to doting senpai was swift and terrifying.
As she rubbed her cheek against Iino's like some sort of clingy octopus, her defeated cards mysteriously vanished into the discard pile. But Kanade narrowed his eyes.
"I saw that," he said flatly. "You had nine cards left. Don't try to hide your shame."
The air around Fujiwara turned icy.
No mercy. No forgiveness. Just facts.
She'd started the match full of confidence, bragging like the final boss of a filler arc—and now? Now she was just the comic relief character who had played herself.
Win? Win, my ass! Getting destroyed by a newbie on her first try? That was her fate.
As if things couldn't get more absurd, Iino Miko suddenly turned to look at Kanade—no, at Natsukawa Kanade, who had been watching the chaos silently from the sidelines this whole time.
With sparkling eyes, she asked, "Then… what's the prize for winning? Does the president grant you a wish or something? Like… a request he has to agree to?"
Natsukawa Kanade blinked, startled, as all eyes slowly turned toward the president.
Kanade: "...Eh?"
He stiffened.
"Wait, since when was that a thing?! Who said that?! Iino-san, are you making up rules again?!"
"Eh? I thought that's how these games work…" she murmured innocently, tilting her head.
Fujiwara Chika, ever the chaos gremlin, clapped her hands together with devilish glee. "Yatta! Then next game, I'm definitely going to win and ask for something really embarrassing, fufufu~!"