My name is Jing. In my high school years, I had to transfer schools due to my parents' work.
Stepping into a new environment and an unfamiliar school, I felt incredibly insecure. On my first day, the teacher led me to my new class. Nervously, I introduced myself, "Hello everyone, my name is Jing."
The teacher nodded. "Alright, Jing, take the seat next to the class president. If you have any questions, feel free to ask him."
I slowly walked over, pulled out the chair, and sat down. Suddenly, a hand reached out beside me.
"Hey, I'm Yu. I hope we get along well."
I shook his hand, replying softly, "Nice to meet you."
The warmth of his hand and the kindness in his smile seemed to tell me that I had nothing to fear.
From that day on, he took great care of me. Worried that I wouldn't adapt well, he would always check in, "Jing, if you have any problems, make sure to tell me, okay?"
I would always nod and answer, "Mm."
Over time, we grew closer, and I found myself initiating conversations with him. I realized that I liked him—ever since that first greeting. He was the first person to offer me warmth.
But such feelings were impossible to confess. He was the most popular guy in school, admired by many.
One day, on my way home, a group of girls blocked my path.
"You're Jing, right?"
I hesitated but nodded.
"Come with us."
They led me into a deserted alley. Before I could react, one of them slapped me.
"You like Yu, don't you?"
I stayed silent.
Another slap followed. "You shameless girl. Don't think someone like him would ever like you. Keep dreaming. Stay away from him."
I didn't dare resist. I let them vent their anger on me, and only after they left did I slowly get up and walk home.
Standing before the mirror, I saw my bruised arms and swollen face. Tears fell uncontrollably.
Is it wrong to like someone?
The next day at school, Yu greeted me as usual with his bright smile.
"Good morning, Jing!"
I didn't dare look at him and lowered my head. "Morning."
He seemed to notice something was off.
"Jing, what's wrong?"
"I'm fine."
Suddenly, he cupped my face in his hands.
"Why is your face swollen?"
"I… I tripped on my way home yesterday," I lied.
He chuckled, ruffling my hair. "You need to be more careful next time, alright?"
"…Alright."
As he walked away, I touched my face and hair where he had just touched me.
Yes, I still liked him.
But fear lingered in my heart. I was afraid those girls would come after me again.
Yet, before they could, my feelings for him were shattered.
One day, as I was heading down to the cafeteria, I overheard someone ask Yu, "Do you like Jing?"
I stopped in my tracks, waiting for his answer.
He chuckled, then said, "No, I don't like her. The teacher just asked me to look after her. She's too quiet and well-behaved, not my type."
At that moment, my heart plummeted.
I should have known from the start—he was never going to like me.
My secret crush had no future.
That evening, those girls confronted me again on my way home. This time, they kicked and punched me relentlessly.
Desperate, I fought back.
"He doesn't like me!! I heard it myself! So please, stop hitting me! I won't go near him anymore, I promise! Please… just let me go…"
I broke down, crying helplessly.
Eventually, they spared me.
"Good. If it happens again, you'll regret it."
Wiping away my tears, I limped back to my cold, empty house.
My parents had never cared for me. They were always too busy with work, leaving early and returning late—or not coming home at all. I had never felt love from them.
Yu was the first person to show me kindness. Though I knew it was just his responsibility as class president, I still couldn't help falling for him.
After tending to my wounds, I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling as silent tears streamed down my face.
Is it truly wrong to like someone?
If not, then why… why did they hurt me for it?
I began doubting myself.
Exhausted from crying, I eventually fell asleep.
In the middle of the night, I felt my body burning up. Fever—I knew I was falling sick.
I forced myself up, intending to take some medicine, but after rummaging through my drawers, I realized I had run out. With no other choice, I crawled back into bed, hoping I would recover on my own.
I didn't know how long I had slept when the doorbell suddenly rang.
Dragging my weak body, I made my way to the door.
When I opened it, I saw Yu standing there.
For a moment, I thought I was hallucinating.
I wanted to speak, but before I could, my vision went black, and I collapsed.
I felt someone catching me, calling my name over and over.
Before I lost consciousness completely, I whispered,
"Yu, I don't want to like you anymore… Loving you hurts too much…"
And then, everything faded to darkness.