Arthur decided to confront Nick and hear from him directly, but Nick did not comply; instead, he continued to avoid Arthur, sending messages to voicemail and avoiding reading his texts. His heart had broken into a million more pieces. He began remembering all the love he and Nick shared, the kisses, and everything they loved.
Arthur remembered the night they sneaked out to the night market.
Nick had dragged him through the congested streets, insisting on trying each street food stand. Arthur had laughed and shook his head as he watched Nick eat a skewer of grilled pork.
"You are going to make yourself sick," Arthur had warned, crossing his arms.
Nick had merely smirked, his lips full. "Worth it"
Arthur had rolled his eyes, but the warmth in his chest had been undeniable. They had shared a sticky mango dessert, their fingers brushing, and Arthur had thought, This is it. This is happiness.
Arthur could still see it clearly—the golden glow of Wat Arun at sunrise, the air filled with the aroma of incense and jasmine.
They had stood side by side, lighting incense sticks, pouring silent wishes into the smoke as it curled toward the sky.
Arthur had turned to Nick. "What did you wish for?"
Nick had grinned at him, his eyes incredibly gentle, "For us to always be together."
Arthur had squeezed his hand. "Me too."
But their hopes hadn't come true.
Arthur gasped, his body shivering as he was yanked back to reality. The memories hurt too much.
His chest clenched as the anguish burst like a tidal wave, choking him. He put his fists on his temples, trying to stop the thoughts, trying to calm the ache in his heart.
"I loved you, Nick."
His breathing became ragged, his vision distorted with fresh tears.
And suddenly, he snapped.
With a broken cry, Arthur tossed his phone across the room. It hit the wall with a loud crack, the sound reverberating throughout the empty room.
He tore at his hair, his hands shaking as he struggled to his feet. He needed to make it stop. He needed to stop feeling like his heart was being ripped apart piece by piece.
With feverish fury, he started tearing his flat apart—knocking over furniture, hurling books, and destroying picture frames. The framed portrait of him and Nick smashed as it hit the floor, glass flying across the wooden boards.
He went to his knees, crying.
"I did nothing."
His voice shook as he curled into himself, his entire body quivering.
"I did nothing to him. I loved him. I loved him my whole life. How could he do this to me, Pim? How?
A stifled sob escaped him as he swayed back and forth.
Pim was crying too, kneeling alongside him, gripping his shoulders as if trying to piece him back together.
Tyler was still near the doorway, his face blanched, his hands locked into fists. There was something in his eyes—guilt, hesitancy. But Arthur was too far gone to notice.
"What did I do?" Arthur moaned, his voice breaking. "How can I live without him now?"
Pim drew him into a close embrace, her sobbing mixed with his.
"You're not alone, Arthur," she said. "You're not alone."
Tyler gulped hard, his throat constricting. He wanted to say something. He wanted to solve this.
But how could he?
How could he, when he was part of the reason Arthur was hurting?
Arthur couldn't stay in that flat any longer. The walls were choking him, the shattered glass reflecting his brokenness.
He grabbed his keys and ran.
His feet brought him to the river—the same location where he had stood months earlier, peering into the black water, wondering if it would be better to just… let go.
He stood on the brink, his heart thumping in his chest.
The lake shimmered under the moonlight, the city's radiance reflecting like shards of crushed dreams.
For a second, he pondered jumping.
For a moment, he thought about letting the current take him, letting the suffering evaporate.
But then, his phone buzzed in his pocket.
With shaky hands, he took it out.
It was his mom.
"I love you, son. Come home."
Arthur's knees weakened as he broke down, sobbing.
He couldn't do it.
He couldn't leave her.
He couldn't let this pain engulf him.
Arthur walked home in quiet, his body tired, his heart crushed but still beating.
The instant he stepped inside, his mother wrapped him in a tight embrace, her warmth the only thing holding him together.
He buried his face on her shoulder, crying like a kid.
"I don't know how to live without him, Mom."
She grabbed him tighter, stroking his hair. "You will. One day at a time."
But as Arthur lay in bed that night, staring at the ceiling, he couldn't see that future.
All he could see was Nick. And the love they lost.