Mika was on his way to his room when he encountered Ayk at the doorway. Mika froze, staring at the ground, unable to look him in the face. Ayk stood before him, gave him a nudge in the chest, and said, "What's wrong? Can't you look your older brother in the eye?"
Mika's whole body trembled as he tried not to cry, then he said, "I'm sorry, Ayk… I'm sorry… Because of my weakness… Because of me… I made you break the promise you gave to Skiki… and worse than that…" Mika's voice choked as he shut his eyes, trying to keep the tears from flowing, "I… I made you kill Skiki…"
Ayk said, "So what?"
Mika raised his head in astonishment as Ayk continued, "No one is more important to me than you! You fool! You're all I have in this life! I've told you before, I don't care about a promise made to a dead woman! I only care about you!"
Mika couldn't hold back his tears; he broke down, sobbing. Ayk drew him close by the back of his head and pressed him to his chest, saying, "Cry all you want—There's no shame in a man's tears—But get a grip quickly!"
Mika's cries went louder when he listened to these words. They stood there for a while, Mika crying in his brother's arms, until he pulled away from his brother's embrace. He kept trying to wipe away his tears that only flowed more… He couldn't even respond—his throat was tight with sobs…
Ayk patted his shoulder, then left him, heading on his way. Mika stepped into the room, finding it empty. He walked over to his bed, reached beneath it, and pulled out a box… He opened the box to find the candy he stole from the food stall during the Festival…
He remembered his last memory of Skiki—She was preparing a bag of pastries for him and Ayk. Mika had said, "Skiki, we're not going on a trip! We can't take all this stuff with us!" Ayk smacked him on the head and retorted, "Be grateful, boy! You'll eat all these treats Skiki stayed up late baking for us!"
Skiki let out her thunderous laugh and said, "Yes! Listen to your older brother!" Then she looked at Ayk with a terrifying, wide-eyed glare and demanded, "What do you mean, 'You'll eat'? Don't you mean 'We'll eat'! Think you don't need my food just because you're huge?"
Mika laughed, so Skiki went on in that booming voice, "You idiots! Don't forget me! If you don't come visit me and bring me loads of food and candy from Frata, I'll kill you!" Mika said, "Fine… just don't complain when I can't eat your food anymore after tasting Frata's!"
Mika crushed the wrapped sweets in his hand, tears streaming over them… "Skiki… How did things end up like this…?"
Someone knocked on the door, so Mika quickly wiped away his tears. Fojta's voice said, "May I come in?" Mika didn't reply, but she came in anyway and sat beside him.
She asked, "Are you okay?"
Mika sneered, "This is the men's quarters… Or do you usually show up here?" He looked at her slyly and said, "Tell me… how much do men here pay for a face like that? How much were you worth ar Azzar's?"
Fojta flared up and shouted in anger, "Why are you saying this to me??"
Mika snapped, "Why did you come here? What do you want?? I don't have any money!! So get out of my sight!!"
Her eyes filled with tears, and she yelled, "Why? If you see me that way… Why did you save someone as ugly as me? Why didn't you let me die?? Why did you act like you were my hero??"
Fojta buried her face in her hands, crumpling onto the bed. Mika was silent for a moment, then laughed, "What… Me? Your hero? That's ridiculous…"
Mika looked at her… She wasn't pretty, like other girls—She had a masculine face, sharp features, an eyepatch over her left eye, long black hair she always kept tied up… Mika said, "I didn't mean to say you're ugly. I like strong girls with long hair, as you know…"
Fojta said in pain, "You say you like long-haired girls, but then why do you fancy that girl with short hair?"
Mika's eyes widened, then he lowered his head as he remembered Seeta, his face crinkling… After a pause, he said, "That man… Azar… You really mourned his death, didn't you?"
Fojta answered earnestly, voice shaking, "Azar… Azar was the one who took my eye… He sold me over and over again... Whenever he had a buyer... I never ate good food in his house... I never wore pretty clothes... He kept telling me, how ugly I am... He sold me for a low price because I'm ugly... He fed me the worst food because I'm ugly... I wore the worst clothes because I'm ugly... So... Was it really his fault? Is he really that bad? If my ugliness is the reason... Can I not be sad for him... I don't even remember my father and mother… Perhaps I killed them in Bial without knowing…"
She looked at Mika and said, crying, "When you held me then…"
Mika listened in astonishment. She went on, standing in anger, "Why would you say those things to someone? Why did you save me? Why do all this just to break my heart afterward??"
Mika got up, wiped her tears, and looked at her for a moment. Then he said, "What are you saying? Me? A hero? I saved you? I've never done anything right my entire life, and you say now I'm a hero?"
Fojta gazed at him briefly, then suddenly kissed him—Kissed him fiercely, as if it were the last kiss—As if she might never get another chance. Before he could push her away—He didn't. He kissed her back.
He then looked at her face again, at her tearful eye, then threw her onto his bed and climbed on top of her… Her breathing quickened, and she asked, "Do you love me?"
He replied, "No… But you still want this, right?"
She nodded. Right as Mika leaned toward her—Someone opened the door and walked in—a commander from the Iron Hands.
Mika jumped away from Fojta, who quickly got up. The soldier glared and demanded, "What are you doing? No women allowed in this section!!"
He stood before Mika and barked, "You bring girls to your barracks, Black Soul?!"
Trying to keep his anger in check, Mika said, "Hey, Commander… can't you let it go this time?"
The soldier struck Mika in the chest, saying, "Why would a worm like you… Think you can speak to me so casually?"
Rage flared across Mika's face, but Fojta intervened, stepping between them and bowing her head, "I'm sorry, it's my fault; I came here on my own."
The soldier looked at her with contempt and said, "Harlots of Bial! Is that why you've come here?!"
He pointed to the door, "Get out and don't come back!"
She nodded and walked out, giving Mika a sideways glance as he followed behind. After they got out, Fojta paused, looking at him, but stopped when she saw that same fury on his face again.
Mika thought… Is this how they treat us after all of this?
Fojta said, "Mika…"
Mika growled, "I saved you once, and you saved me once—We're even now. So… Leave me alone!"
He left her standing, bewildered… and headed outside…
Ayk had reached the communal bathroom and shut the door behind him. He stood there, gazing at his reflection in the mirror. His face twisted as he stared at himself… Then he lifted his shirt, revealing bandages around his stomach. He remembered the promise he had made to Skiki…
Ayk had once returned from Azzar's place to pick up his brother from Skiki's. He was covered in wounds and bruises… He ignored the way Skiki would stare at him every day as he came to take Mika home. He took Mika's hand to leave, but she stopped him, saying, "Is this the man you want your brother to look up to when he grows up?"
Eleven-year-old Ayk froze, eyes wide. What did she just say? What did she mean?
She continued, "How can you hold your brother's hand as though you're his big brother… if your hands are stained with blood like that?"
Ayk turned to her angrily, "What are you saying, you vile woman? Who are you to talk about me and my brother?! If you weren't a woman, I'd—"
He never finished, because Skiki landed a powerful punch that hurled him against one of the bakery walls. Mika screamed, running to Ayk, and yelled at Skiki, "Why did you do that, Auntie Skiki!"
Ayk got up, spitting out blood, glaring at Skiki and saying, "Don't call her Auntie! She's not your aunt! We have no family… No mother, no father, no aunt!"
He turned to Mika, "It's just us!!"
Skiki looked at him sternly, then kicked him in the jaw. Ayk collapsed, injured, and Mika began to cry.
Ayk, in pain, said weakly, "Don't cry, Mika… Men don't cry…"
Skiki retorted, "Don't listen to this jerk! There's no shame in a man's tears… Cry as much as you want… But always remember…"
She walked over to Ayk, pinning him down under her foot, "To get a grip quickly!!"
Ayk strained to get up, but Skiki held her foot firmly, "Men cry… Men feel pain… Men feel lonely… But do you know what men don't do? They don't kill others! They don't harm people! They do whatever they can to help everyone… Which is why you're no man in my eyes!"
Ayk let out a groan, still trying to stand up. Skiki went on, "You work in that bastard Azzar's house for money?"
Ayk spat angrily, "Yes!! Isn't that what men do?! Don't they do whatever they can to provide for their family?!"
He shouted, "I'm doing my best so Mika won't have to do something like this! So leave me alone, you giant troll!"
Skiki was silent for a moment, then said, "I see… So you're feeding your brother food tainted with blood… Feeding him the flesh of others who are also trying to provide for their families!"
Ayk's eyes grew wide in horror. Skiki finally lifted her foot from him, saying, "If you want to provide for your brother… You can work here… He's already working here, anyway…"
Ayk looked at Mika, and Mika, still crying, said, "I was saving money to help you… so you'd stop going to Azzar…"
Skiki helped Ayk up and said, "You can eat pure food—food that doesn't hurt going down. You can enjoy the taste of food again… food not tainted by blood…"
Ayk stood there, looking at her, until she said, "But… You must promise me… That you'll become a real man! And you'll stop going to Azzar's! And that you'll never shed blood again! Do you promise me that?"
Ayk's eyes brimmed with tears, and he said, "I promise…"
Leaning over the sink in weakness, tears fell from Ayk's eyes onto the white marble. He began to unwrap the bandages around his stomach, revealing several wounds—some shallow, some deep. Some had brownish scabs, while others looked red and recent. He pulled a razor from his pocket and began pressing it across his skin until his expression went blank and the fresher wounds bled on his hands.
He stayed that way for a while before hearing a voice behind him, "What are you doing?"
Ayk jumped in alarm and saw Fojta, who had opened the door. She looked at the razor in his hands and the wounds on his stomach. She seemed confused and said, "Are you hurting yourself? Why?"
Trying to mask his panic with anger, Ayk snapped, "This is none of your business!"
He hastily threw the razor into the sink and started washing his trembling hands… But… Blood was soaking his clothes, and they were now stained red.
Panic seized him. Fojta said, "You're bleeding!"
Ayk shouted, "Don't you think I can see that?!"
Fojta fell silent. Ayk tried to calm himself, then said, "Don't tell Mika about this…" He looked at her, pleading, "Please… Mika can't see me like this…"
Fojta studied him for a moment… Then nodded. She picked up a towel, ran it under the water, and began wiping the blood from his clothes.
Ayk looked at her with a blend of gratitude and astonishment. In a hushed, almost whispered voice, he said, "Thank you…"