At exactly 6 AM, John and Jane stood on the beach. The sun was just beginning to rise, casting orange light over the soft sand and gentle waves.
One minute later, a black SUV with tinted windows sped along the shore.
"That's our guy," John smirked. "Even drives a gangster car."
"I don't get how you can be so calm," Jane frowned. "A supervillain is coming straight at us!"
"You know, compared to meeting Thor, this feels a lot calmer," Rider glanced at the water. "Back then, I hoped I could talk my way out of it. But with Juggernaut, it's clear from the start—there's no avoiding a fight. It's like switching from poker to chess. No need to read faces or play tricks anymore. All the pieces are on the board—you just have to win."
"Didn't know you played chess," she looked at him with newfound curiosity.
"I'm full of surprises," he smirked.
"Stay focused!" Thunderheart commanded. "Stay battle-ready!"
The SUV came to a stop.
A very large—but still within human limits—man stepped out. Tall and broad, built more like Wilson Fisk than the Hulk. His head was hidden under a rough brown helmet, with knuckle dusters, a chest plate, and knee guards made of the same material. Over this hideous setup, he wore a stylish Hawaiian shirt and black shorts.
[I'm already starting to like Cain.]
"Yo, stylin' boys!" Cain grinned, flashing all his teeth. "You guys seen Ghost Rider and Thor on this beach?"
[I take my words back.]
"That's us," John said calmly. "We're the ones who called you here."
"The hell? The baddest dudes in town are a cripple and a chick?" Juggernaut laughed so hard he scared off all the seagulls. "Kids, scram! I'm waiting for some real gangsters of the magic world!"
John and Jane didn't laugh.
"Oh, come on!" the giant's eyes widened. "I don't believe it! You ain't Ghost Rider!"
"You sure?" Rider calmly lit his hand on fire.
"Ghost Rider is a badass biker on a chopper! And you're just some loser in a wheelchair!" Cain stomped the sand. "Ghost Rider's got a flaming skull for a head, and you've got a dumb mask covering your whole damn face. What's it for, huh? So your snot doesn't drip out?"
"Dude, in that helmet, you look like a giantess's vibrator," John noted. "But you won't take it off, because you don't want to lose the perks of your partial transformation."
"Alright, Skull Boy, you know your stuff," Cain turned to Jane. "And who's this? Don't try to sell me that she's Thor! I've met that bastard—his ugly mug is unforgettable."
"I'm not Thor!" Jane stepped forward, her voice firm. "And I'm not his sister either! I'm Thunderheart!"
"Got it," Cain said simply and walked back to his car.
"Are you serious?!" Jane exclaimed. "You're just gonna drive away?!"
"Of course not," giant muttered from the car. "Like I'd leave two second-rate mutants who scammed me like a chump?"
Cain pulled out a machine gun.
"I hate mutants!" he roared and opened fire.
Juggernaut with a machine gun is a fucking nightmare.
Luckily, Jane was the fastest girl in the Wild West. With a single hammer throw, she shattered machine gun before all hell could break loose.
"You got a magic hammer?" Cain tossed aside the wreckage and grinned as Mjolnir flew back into her hand. "You know, I got a magic hammer too! If you rub it just right, it'll rise up!"
Cain waggled his eyebrows. Jane rolled her eyes.
"No vacation romances," John said sternly. "Cain, you're a simple guy, so I'll keep it simple. We're about to fight. If you lose, you hear me out. That's it."
"And if I win?" giant smirked, bloodlust in his eyes.
"You'll still listen," strategist smirked back. "Because you're curious about what I have to say."
"You sly little shit!" Cain wagged a finger at him. "Any other day, I'd pull your underwear over your head for that, but I like you! Alright, you got me. Now get up from that chair so I can kick your ass real quick, then we'll head back to finish your cake."
"You'll be fighting her," John pointed at Jane and rolled back into the shade. "I'm just the ref today."
"You high or somethin'? What kind of self-respecting guy fights a chick?"
"What did you just say?!" Jane stepped forward, her eyes blazing. The wind tousled her hair. "You think women—"
Cain's leg shot out.
The kick hit so hard it knocked the air from her lungs and sent her flying across the beach, slamming her into the sand on the far end.
She didn't get up immediately, pressing a hand to the chest plate beneath her t-shirt.
"My bad! That move's on autopilot when someone charges at me like a damn bull!" Cain awkwardly rubbed his helmet. "For the record, I'm all for equality—I even voted for that chick with the huge tits in the presidential election."
The sky darkened. The wind picked up. Jane fired a lightning bolt from Mjolnir.
"Damn. That could kill," Cain chuckled softly. Smoke rose from his body. "So you've decided to challenge me after all?"
Instead of answering, Jane dropped into a fighting stance.
"Okay then," Juggernaut cracked his knuckles with a grin. "As a gentleman, I can't refuse a lady's request."
A brutal fight began. Mjolnir's blows rained down on his massive helmet, each hit echoing loudly. Every punch from his crimson knuckles made her ribs creak like thunder. Neither fighter gave an inch—matching each other in strength and ferocity.
John watched from the shadows, sipping cognac straight from the bottle. He pulled out his newly bought smartphone to record the battle.
"Hey, Skull Boy, you filming this?" Cain smirked. "I'm about to show this to Hulk!"
Juggernaut grabbed Thunderheart by the leg and started slamming her into the sand.
[Heh. If two out of three people at a party are having fun, that's a good party, right?]
"You know what a bad day is, blondie?" Cain approached the half-buried Jane and placed the Crimson Gem of Cyttorak on her chest. "Think about it. I'll be right back."
Tensing his legs, he launched himself into the sky.
"Agh!" Jane growled, clawing at the gem. "I can't move it!"
"Interesting use of an artifact," John mused, taking another sip of cognac. "I'll remember that trick."
"Well, blondie?! Figured it out yet?!" Cain's thunderous voice boomed from above. "A bad day is when a big guy beats you with a plane!"
From the clouds, Juggernaut descended—holding an actual airplane.
"There's a pilot in there!" Jane screamed in desperation. "You can't do this!"
Cain wasn't listening anymore. Three… Two… One…
A white lightning bolt struck the cockpit a second before impact.
Juggernaut stood amidst fire and wreckage.
"Did I get a concussion or what?" He squinted. "Why are there two blondes?!"
John blinked, not believing his eyes.
Two identical Janes stood on the beach. One held the pilot. The other clenched her fists. Both were furious. Both breathed in unison.
[Holy shit…]
"You thick-skulled idiot!" first Jane shouted.
"You almost got someone killed!" second Jane added.
"What 'someone'? That's Jorge!" Cain pointed at the fleeing pilot. "The courier Don Pedro's. Take a deep breath, blondie—smell that? Cocaine."
Kilos of narcotics burned in the wreckage, filling the air with a sickly sweet scent.
[Good thing our enhanced bodies are immune to toxins.]
"By the way, how'd you get out from under the gem?" Cain held out his hand, and the artifact flew back to him from the sand. "And where's your hammer?"
"None of your business!" first Jane snapped. "You were given great power to do good, but you waste it playing gangster!"
"That's stupid!" second Jane added. "You don't deserve your power!"
"Don't care!" Juggernaut smirked. "I'll just smash you both!"
The "twins" launched forward, fists raised.
They moved like electric acrobats—constantly leaping, supporting each other, firing lightning from their palms. The sluggish Juggernaut couldn't keep up, and it pissed him off.
"Enough, you electric lice!" Cain clapped his massive hands together.
His palms closed around Jane's head—but she turned into living lightning, zapping through his fingers and into the Jane standing behind him, instantly transforming into Mjolnir.
"Thunderous Funeral!" Jane roared.
The hammer in her hand crackled with white lightning. The air filled with primal magic. A strike of divine power crashed down onto Juggernaut's helmet.
The impact triggered an earthquake, felt in the nearest cities. The sky played a thunderous symphony. The unstoppable Juggernaut fell.
John switched off his smartphone. The battle was over.
"Did you kill him?" Ghost Rider, wheels ablaze, rolled up to the motionless giant.
"That's impossible!" She dropped to her knees and expertly checked for a pulse. Her tense expression quickly melted into relief. "Phew! He's alive..."
"You hit his soul hard with that magic," John diagnosed, having gone through something similar himself. "I've never seen you land a hit like that before."
"I've never hit anyone that hard before!" Jane snapped, pacing. "It was improvisation! You saw it yourself—I couldn't get through his stupid shield!"
"The Shield of Ruin," strategist explained. "Juggernaut covered his body in an invisible crimson film that destroys any non-magical attack before it lands. I'll remember that technique."
[That could help me keep my clothes intact against non-magical enemies.]
"Easy for you to say! You weren't fighting him!" She pointed at the scrapes on her arms. "My attacks weren't working! The lightning barely tingled him! I panicked… Then I remembered how you reached into the core of Zarathos and did the same."
[It took me a month to learn how to tap into Zarathos' power… She saw it once and did it in a second?!]
John narrowed his eyes. No. Her palm was burned—injuries that magical regeneration couldn't heal. Her control wasn't strong enough to keep from hurting herself.
"You're learning in the middle of a fight? That's cool," John praised her, keeping his tone neutral. "Where did the twin Jane come from?"
"You mean Mjolnir?" She secured the hammer at her belt. "We draw power from artifacts, but once I tried doing the opposite—I transferred my life force into an artifact. That's how my copy appeared."
"And what can she do?"
"Everything I can." Thunderheart shrugged. "Mjolnir inherits all my skills and memories."
"Can your copy act independently?"
"Yes, exactly as I would." Jane removed her helmet. "But I can still see through her eyes, and I remain in control."
[That's basically being in two places at once… I need to learn this.]
"Will you teach me?"
"Of course," Jane answered as expected—always kind. "What do we do with Juggernaut? Should we take him to the Sorcerer Supreme?"
"I'm not getting into Doc's debt." John grimaced. "He'll be fine on his own."
///
An hour later, three Avatars of Infinity were sitting in the late Don Pedro's mansion, finishing off yesterday's cake with a commemorative inscription.
"Ugh, last time I got my ass kicked like that was two years ago." Cain took off his helmet and pressed ice to the lump on his forehead. "How the hell did you do that, Blondie?"
Jane was about to answer, but John abruptly cut in.
"We'll tell you and teach you—if we come to an agreement."
[Jane's kindness is for me to exploit, and me alone.]
"I hate losing, but I always acknowledge when I do." Cain stuffed a huge piece of cake into his mouth. "Blondie won fair and square. I'm listening, Skull Boy."
"I know you're dying from soul decay," John met the eyes of another damned man. "I know where to get the cure."
Juggernaut set his plate aside, stood to his full, towering height, and loomed menacingly over Rider.
Jane immediately grabbed her hammer, aiming it at the threat.
John didn't move, waiting calmly.
"Skull Boy, just so we're clear—we're talking some serious shit right now," Cain's usual smirk was gone. "If this turns out to be bullshit or a scam, I'll break your spine, got it?"
"That all?"
"Uh…" giant hesitated at his calmness. "Yeah?"
"Then listen up—shove your dumbass threats up your ass!" With every word, the temperature in the room rose. "I've got twelve months left to live—she's got five! We didn't come here to play in the sand! We are dying, and we have only a little time left to fix this mess! Got it, motherfucker?!"
"Whoa, whoa, chill!" Cain collapsed onto his steel chair with a loud thud. "I get it—nobody wants to die. We're in the same boat."
"Exactly!" Jane's voice took on an inspiring tone. "And since we're a team, we need to respect each other. No more insulting nicknames or slurs. Inside the team, there must be mutual respect."
"Alright, Blondie… I mean, Jane." giant grinned. "Alright, John—how are you saving our asses?"
"We need to beat the recipe for the cure out of Thor."
"Oh, fuck…" Juggernaut ran a hand down his face. "Did I mention the last time I got my ass kicked was two years ago? Yeah, well—that was Thor. One hit from his hammer sent me flying from New York to Mexico."
"He messed me up too." John smirked crookedly. "My bones still ache. But now, there's more of us. As they say—'even a lion can be taken down by a pack.'"
"How much power did Thor use against you?"
"Sixty percent."
"Shit, same here." Cain frowned. "Just the two of us against Thor? Our chances are crap. But if we had the lady…"
"Thor is completely immune to my lightning," Jane cut him off.
"Then we're fucked," Cain threw his empty plate at the wall. "Sorry, gotta go feed Cyttorak."
"We understand," Jane said gently. "Better break plates than our bones."
"We can't beat Thor with just the two of us," Cain repeated. "So what's the plan, genius?"
"Same as before—keep gathering Avatars of Infinity and beat the answers out of that bastard." John smirked. "So? You joining my crew?"
"Spend my last months on booze and women or fight till the end?" Juggernaut crushed the table under his grip. "You're asking if I'm in? Hell fucking yeah!"
/////
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