"Yaaawn~" I exaggerate my yawn, stretching like a sloth taking a nap. If anyone didn't hear it, get your ears checked.
I'm forced to keep standing up and down all morning, my legs are already taking their toll, just like that miserable bus ride. This will mark the return of the noodle legs arc? Thank you, universe, for this cheap comedy script.
The principal makes some endless speech of thanks that I couldn't care less about. 'Honor... effort... future... blablabla', so I just tune out, putting my mind in airplane mode until this ceremony wraps up, much like any other lame-ass entrance ceremony.
But those aren't my only complaints. The entrance ceremonies for elementary school, junior high, and high school all mean the same thing: the start of another major trial for children.
I always hear the same arguments: 'You're an elementary school student now, not a kindergartener, you should behave like one,' or 'You're in middle school and you should grow up more.' But what is this discourse really about? They're stealing your childhood for something as insignificant as a grade, a grade that, in the end, will have no relevance in your adult life.
The real question is: does truly enjoying childhood or adolescence mean being stuck indoors all day, following rules mindlessly? For me, the answer is no. Youth is a unique period that never repeats itself. If you're young, don't live in fear of punishment—instead, use this opportunity to step out, make connections, and yes, even have some fun and break a few rules. You only have one life, and youth is like an hourglass: once the sand runs out, lost time can't be recovered.
Though, I can't help but think that even this snooze-fest marks the beginning of a major milestone for every high-school student. The last step of childhood before we all plunge into the adult world.
The ceremony concludes without any mishaps. Then, at noon, they give us a tour, giving an explanation of all the campus buildings and facilities before the class splits up. It's pretty impressive, but the information just goes in one ear and out the other.
Around 70 to 80 percent of the students make their way to the dorms, while the rest quickly form their little groups. Some head to cafés while the louder ones head out for karaoke. The hustle and bustle quickly dies down.
I decide to head to my dorm and get my desired quick nap. Honestly, I need to re-energize my social batteries after this exhausting day.
On my way to my dorm, I stop by a convenience store. "Hmmm... might as well make a quick store run after my power nap. Nice." I mentally add it to my to-do list and continue on my way.
As I continue to walk, out of nowhere, a cheerful voice calls out, "Hey, Shiroi!"
"Huh?" I turn around in confusion, my expression turning sour as I see Ike, sprinting towards me. Typical of him to be over-the-top hyperactive, as always.
He grins and motions for me to follow as he speaks. "I was just looking for you. One of my friends wants to meet you. Come on, let's go for a minute."
"Who is he?"
"Just wait and see. He's really cool, I promise." He grins before grabbing my arm, starting to lead me in a different direction. Reflexively, I let out a deep sigh and follow him, not out of curiosity, but to prevent his little voice from continuing to pierce into my ear like a drill.
He leads me through the campus, finally reaching a spot where a young guy with messy hair stands waiting. Ike claps a hand on his shoulder and grins at me.
"This is Yamauchi Haruki. He's a friend of mine and a pretty cool guy."
Yamauchi straightens, adjusting his collar like he's the protagonist of a school drama. "Wassup, dude. Ike told me you're the rebel without a cause of the group. I like you."
"Nice to meet you. I'm Shiroi Misaki. The only heretic in this communion of charlatans." I say, extending my hand.
"Just call me Yamauchi." he lets out a forced laugh, shaking my hand with a confident grip. He continues.
"I heard your intro, and man I gotta say, you really blew us away. 'Champion of avoiding responsibility'... Did you get that line from a manga or come up with it after a night of heavy drinking?"
Suddenly, I step closer, widening my eyes like luffy discovering flesh.
"Wait a minute." I say in a low, conspiratorial tone,
"Talking about introductions. I heard you competed in national-level table tennis and were the ace of your baseball team in inter-high. Is that true?"
"Geh..."
For a moment, his confident smile falters. But he quickly regains his composure, raising his chin with pride.
"Really? You think so?" He responds coolly, his tone laced with pride.
"You must've heard some exaggerations. But it's not a big deal. A little embellishment here and there never hurt anyone, right?"
"Aw, come on! Don't be all modest. You gotta have done some seriously awesome stuff. I mean, who else could pull off such legendary feats?" I say, still playing the role of the fool.
Yamauchi crosses his arms and grins slyly, acting like the main character in a cliché sports manga. His calm demeanor reveals that nothing seems to faze him.
"Legendary, huh? I guess you can call it that. If you think I'm that amazing, who am I to disagree?" He says, his voice dripping with self-satisfaction.
Listening to his incredible and confident responses, I can't help but gush. "You're amazing! The way you carry yourself, that straight posture, your confident smile... it's like you're straight out of a sports anime! I never thought about the possibility of meeting the ace of a baseball team, I get it now! Does your immense power come from your particular hairstyle?" I stay fixated on him, the admiration in my gaze unwavering.
Yamauchi frowns, giving me a skeptical once-over, before turning to his friend as if to ask, 'This guy serious?' Despite the doubt, his ego does not let the opportunity pass him by.
Then, he puffs up with pride, now proudly flexing his imaginary muscles, and beams with more self-confidence than I ever thought it's possible.
"That's right! That's the power of being a natural born winner, my friend." He runs a hand through his spiky hair.
"And when you're a natural-born winner, everything just clicks into place. Confidence, swagger, it all comes naturally."
Ike can't help but let out a small snicker, unable to hold back his urge to laugh. Yamauchi glances at him briefly, but his attention soon returns to his own ego-stroked moment.
I lean in with a mischievous glint and say, "It's good to know I have a legit pro in front of me. You know, I never do this, but can I get your autograph?"
Yamauchi's face tenses for a second, but he quickly composes himself, unwilling to relinquish his spotlight.
There's a small cough, and then he speaks. "Y-Yeah, sure... but I need a pen y'know?"
"No worries" I bend down and rummage through my backpack, pulling out a pen and snatching a sheet of paper torn from my notebook.
"Okay." He grabs the pen and scribbles something, giving it a confident flourish before handing it over.
"There you go, bud. Make sure you cherish it like your life depends on it."
I gaze at the signing, it reads... well it tries to read 'Yamauchi Haruki' but with a very, very poor cursive handwriting that even a doctor's one would look neat in comparison.
"Don't worry about the handwriting. My brain is like a supercomputer, it can process thousands of thoughts every second, that I don't have time for insignificant things like neat handwriting."
"Incredible... Can he read my mind or something?" I mumble to myself, my eyes bulging out in shock and awe.
Ike can no longer contain his laughter and bursts into loud guffaws.
"Pfft, Shiroi, are you kidding me? How can you be so stupid? Just look at his sign, Dude, that doesn't even look like his name!"
Ignoring Ike's laughter, Yamauchi leans in closer.
"Don't listen to him, he's just jealous because no one asks for his autograph."
"Autograph? It's more like a scribbled mess! It looks like an electrocardiogram during a grandma's heart attack." Ike chuckles, running a finger under his eye to wipe away his tears of laughter.
"Shut up! Don't make fun of my signature." Yamauchi protests with his arms crossed. Then, he turns to me with a smug look on his face.
"I guess not everyone is cut out to understand my genius, right? Shiroi?"
"Genius? Brother, you just wrote a doodle... if that's supposed to be your 'genius' at work, I fear for humanity."
Ike and I start cracking up. Yamauchi shoots me a pleading look, hoping for a lifeline out of this situation.
"Well, whatever! As long as Shiroi values my autograph, that's all that matters, right? Shiroi!"
With all eyes on me, I look at him with a 'this is too good' smile.
"Well, I'm glad to have your signature," I say with a smug smirk, pausing for a moment before delivering the punchline: "but let's be real, your handwriting is an absolute mess. It's almost as chaotic as your..." I pause again for dramatic effect, "hairstyle."
Ike stifles a chuckle, and Yamauchi's eyes turn dark as he glares at me.
"Hey, cut it out! My curls are pretty dope, alright? And my handwriting may not be perfect, but at least I've got a sense of style!"
Suddenly, I hear a voice in my head blurting out 'Finish him'.
"Style? If you mean 'bedhead wannabe rockstar,' then you've totally nailed it, Yamauchi." I finally deliver the 'fatality'. The comment sends another round of chuckles rippling through the air.
"See, didn't I tell you? Shiroi's a blast!" Ike claps me heartily on the back, and I nearly stumble forward.
"A-ah! Careful, will you?!" I snap, my glare fixed firmly on him, brimming with irritation.
After the laughter over the autograph dies down, Yamauchi adjusts his shirt collar with exaggerated dignity, while Ike wipes away tears from laughing so hard.
Yamauchi checks the time on his phone. "Oh yeah, that's right! We got a karaoke reservation at 1:PM, and free drinks are serious business! Better get going."
Ike perks up at the mention of free drinks, his attention fully piqued. "Free drinks? Count me in! Let's bounce. We can't keep all the free booze waiting."
"Oh, you think you can handle my legendary rendition of Thinking Out Loud? The music teacher cried when I sang it back at our elementary school festival, buddy. I'm a force to be reckoned with on the microphone!"
Well, I guess my time here has come. Time to go home!
"Well, as much as I'd love to chat longer, I got places to go and things to do. Catch ya later, guys." I turn to head off, but Ike quickly grabs my arm, stopping me in my tracks.
"Dude, hang on! Where are you off to in such a rush? Come with us to the karaoke place. You can't turn down free booze, it's code!"
"So now I'm invited? I didn't realize you guys were extending an exclusive invitation. You sure it's fine for me to join?"
Ike slaps me on the back, laughing heartily. "Of course, man! We've got space for you. And if there's no space, we'll just make some. Come on, don't be a spoilsport."
"But, I—" I try to protest, but before I can say anything. Yamauchi interrupts me, his voice like an announcement.
"Enough chit-chat, you two! Karaoke is calling our names, and I'm not about to keep it waiting. Let's get a move on!"
Ike glances at me, noticing my reluctance. He gives me a sly smile, his grip on my shoulder tightening just the slightest bit.
"So, what do you say, Shiroi? Ready to show off your hidden singing skills?"
I sigh, feeling outnumbered by his enthusiasm and Yamauchi's eagerness. "Alright, alright. Looks like I'm being dragged along on this karaoke escapade. Let's get going, before I regret my decision."
And so, the three of us begin walking toward the karaoke bar. Ike and Yamauchi argue over which song they'll choose, while I stay a step behind, watching them with a mixture of exasperation and curiosity.
Humiliating Yamauchi was easy. An ego that inflated only needs a reality check... or bad handwriting. But Ike...
I gaze at Pervy-kun, who is now imitating a pop idol's dance. He's different. If I was the only one making fun of him, sooner or later I'd look like the villain. But if I also make a fool of myself... the scales are balanced. Instant karma: two idiots laughing at themselves, no hard feelings. Brilliant, if I do say so myself.
After that, I chat with those guys for a while, talking about how cool this school is and of course about the girls.
And then, between some more jokes and laughter, the three of us end up going to karaoke.
This school is getting more and more interesting. I can't wait to see what else it has in store for me.