The days after the destruction of Hydra's main base felt like a blur. Despite the victory, the weight of the next steps loomed over all of us. We had crippled Hydra, yes. But the remnants of their organization were scattered—like a shadow waiting to reassemble itself. And, as always, there were the whispers of a much larger scheme that Pierce had been orchestrating in the background. Fury's voice, unwavering as ever, kept ringing in my ears, reminding us that this was far from over.
We were deep in the mountains now, hidden away in a secure S.H.I.E.L.D. facility. It was a place where we could regroup, go over the intel we had retrieved, and prepare for whatever came next. But despite the urgency of the task at hand, I found myself needing a break from it all. My muscles ached from the constant training, the endless running, the never-ending fight. I had trained myself to the brink of exhaustion, seeking to feel alive in a world that had stripped me of everything.
I didn't sleep well. Every time I closed my eyes, the haunting memories of my past resurfaced. The whispers from Hydra. The missions. The blood on my hands. It never stopped, and it never would.
Today, though, I couldn't afford to wallow in the darkness. Steve had insisted we take a break from all the strategizing, to clear our heads. He had noticed my mood, and though he didn't outright say it, I could see the concern in his eyes. He was worried about me. And maybe that was the one thing I could still hold on to.
I walked into the gym, the sounds of weights clanking and the steady rhythm of punching bags echoing around the large room. Steve was already there, warming up, his focus entirely on his training. He was relentless—always pushing himself, always trying to be the best version of himself. It was one of the things I admired most about him, and it was something I couldn't help but compare to my own existence. I was always trying to outrun the darkness, trying to escape the shadow of who I had been.
"Hey," Steve called out, lifting his head to meet my eyes. "You look like you could use some training. We can't let up now."
I offered a tight smile, walking over to a punching bag. "I know. Just needed to clear my head."
Steve nodded, his gaze sharp, but understanding. "I get it. Let's take this one round at a time, okay?"
I didn't answer at first, but I nodded. There was no use talking about it. The guilt, the anger, the unease—it was all buried deep inside me, locked away. The only thing that mattered now was the fight.
The next hour passed in a blur of motion, our bodies working in sync, pushing each other to the limit. Steve's steady rhythm and calm determination pushed me to keep going, to keep fighting. His discipline was something I needed right now. His resolve was something I envied.
We took a break after a brutal sparring session, both of us dripping with sweat, breathing heavily. I wiped my forehead with the back of my hand and grabbed a water bottle from the side.
"You're good," Steve said between breaths. "Better than you were a few months ago."
I couldn't help but grin at that. "Thanks. Guess I've had a lot of time to work on it."
"I think you've always had it in you," Steve replied, sitting down on the mat and leaning back. "But it's not just about physical strength, Bucky. You've got to find some peace too. The kind of peace that comes from knowing you're not the person you used to be."
I stared at him for a moment, trying to find the words. "You don't get it. Every time I close my eyes, I see him. I see the Winter Soldier. I see all the things I've done. And that... that never goes away."
Steve didn't flinch at my words. He just looked at me with that calm, unwavering gaze of his. "I know what it's like to feel like you don't deserve peace. To feel like the things you've done can never be forgiven. But you're not alone in this. You've got me. You've got the rest of us."
I clenched my jaw, feeling the weight of his words sink in. The guilt, the regret—it all felt so much heavier when someone else acknowledged it. But Steve was right. I wasn't alone anymore. I had a team, and for the first time in years, I had someone who saw me for who I could be—not just who I was.
"Thanks," I muttered, taking a deep breath and looking away. "But I don't think I'll ever really be free of it."
"You don't have to be," Steve said quietly. "Just take it one day at a time. One fight at a time."
I nodded, even though I wasn't sure I believed him. But Steve had been through hell himself. If anyone understood how hard it was to find peace, it was him. So I listened, even if I didn't completely understand.
The rest of the day passed in a blur of strategy, briefings, and more intel analysis. We spent hours pouring over the data we had taken from the Hydra base, trying to piece together the final remnants of their plans. But despite all the work, I couldn't shake the feeling that we were still missing something. Something big.
Late that night, as I sat alone in the quiet of the facility, my mind kept racing. The Hydra cells that had been scattered, the way Pierce had manipulated everything from the shadows—it felt like we were still just one step behind. I couldn't shake the feeling that Hydra wasn't done yet. That they were planning something much larger, something we hadn't even seen coming.
I stood up, my muscles aching, and made my way to the gym. I needed to clear my head again. It had always been the one place where I could push away the thoughts, the memories, and focus entirely on the here and now. I didn't care how much I trained tonight. I didn't care how exhausted I was.
I needed to keep fighting. Because as long as I was alive, Hydra wasn't finished. And I couldn't let them win. Not again.
I gripped the weights tightly, pushing myself harder with every rep. I didn't stop, not until my body was screaming at me to give up. But I kept going. The pain was a welcome distraction. It was better than the memories.
And as I finally finished my workout, drenched in sweat and breathing heavily, I felt something shift inside me. Maybe it was the exhaustion. Or maybe it was just the knowledge that, for the first time in a long time, I was fighting for something bigger than myself.
Hydra had taken so much from me, but I wasn't going to let them take the future too.
I was done being their weapon.
This time, I was fighting back.