"It's quiet. So quiet I can hear the nothing. I can't see—anything. I've felt this before. I… I died again."
A shape emerges from the void of nothingness. That grin—too wide, too sharp—cuts through the black.
"After all that talk," the creature says, "it seems you managed to accomplish nothing."
"I couldn't exactly do anything," I say, the words hanging in the air, empty and weak. "But I guess that's the point, isn't it?"
"Don't get the wrong idea," the creature says, its grin fading into something more serious. "Although it may not seem like it, I do want you to accomplish your goal. That's why I keep sending you back."
"Then how else can you help me?" I ask, a bitter edge creeping into my voice. "Because right now, all I'm getting is more of the same."
"True," the creature says, its tone now more thoughtful, "but you have to put the pieces together. It's like a game you've already played—you know what to expect."
"I can't just give you the answers," the creature says, its voice smooth but firm. "But you can ask questions. I'll answer if I know the answer."
"So I'm supposed to just question you until I get the answer to this?" I ask, trying to mask the frustration creeping into my voice.
The creature's expression shifts, becoming more serious. "You should be grateful," it says, voice calm but firm. "You get multiple chances to live. Unlike almost everyone else, you can actually do something about your life."
"Is it actually mad?" I thought, forgetting again that my thoughts are said out loud here.
"I'm not mad. I'm just trying to get you to see it from another view." The creature's tone softens. "A lot of people die and a lot of those people want to live again but can't, and then there's you, who has a chance and won't understand the kind of opportunity he has."
I go quiet. Not because I agree, but because… maybe it has a point. How many times have I been sent back? How many chances have I already wasted?
"Can I ask my first question?" I say, voice low.
The creature nods, slowly. "Go ahead," it says, voice calm now. "Ask."
"In the last rebirth… I was reincarnated as my father. Was…" I swallow, but there's nothing to choke down. "Was he trying to kill himself?"
The creature is quiet for what feels like forever as I await the answer. "Yes."
Although I had already suspected as much, hearing it out loud still hurts more than I thought it would. "Why?" I ask. "Why would he do that?"
"I can't say," the creature says softly, its tone almost… regretful.
"Your supposed to answer my questions, aren't you?" I ask, frustration making my voice shake.
"Well yes, but I can't answer that one." The creature says, its voice gentler than before.
I back off the subject for now. "Then I guess we're done here until next time."
"So you would like me to send you back now?" The creature says, a hint of delight creeping in.
"Funny how you get happy at the thought of me having to suffer more." I say, frustration creeping into my voice.
The creature's grin fades, and its tone softens. "I didn't mean it like that," it says, its voice carrying a strange mix of apology and patience. "I just want you to accomplish want you've suffered for in the first place"
"I was just messing around" I say even though I knew I meant it.
The creature's expression hardens, its voice steady. "Maybe you were. But I'm not here for your games. I'm trying to make you see what you're dealing with."
"You know, you've been acting a lot differently for a while now," I say, the observation hanging in the air.
The creature lets out a quiet sigh as if it's tired of something. "I'm just trying to help you more"
I notice the sigh and assume he's just tired of me being here. "Okay then. Send me back again," I say, trying to sound indifferent.
The creature hesitates, then nods slowly. "Alright. But try not to waste it this time."
And just like that, I'm back in the endless dark—no sound, no light—being reborn once again. It's instantaneous, but in that moment, it feels like the only time I don't have to worry about anything. I've gotten used to it.
And just as soon as it happened, it ended. Once again, I've been reborn.
I guess I should figure out who I am this time.
I'm in a bed that doesn't feel like any in my house, and the room around me is too big to be one of the ones I know. It's unfamiliar, strange, no one I know should have this kind of house.
I turn around and jump—there's a shirtless man staring at me, smiling.
"I thought you weren't going to chase after him," he said, raising an eyebrow. "You said you were planning to leave him anyway," he added, his tone flat.
"Chase after who?" I asked, not having a clue what the man was talking about.
"Your husband—yeah, the one who just bolted out in tears," he said with a grin.
"Husband?" I muttered, my mind racing. "I've got to figure out who I am, and fast."
As I look around, I spot a bathroom and rush in front of the mirror. When I see my reflection, I freeze—this time, I'm… my mom?
There's no doubt about it—this scene screams that she cheated on my dad. That has to be why he ran off… to kill himself.
I went back to the bedroom and asked the man in the bed what "we" were.
The man chuckled and with a grin he said "I like to think we're lovers"
My heart sank I couldn't understand why my mother would do this to my dad, they seemed so happy together.
I was told I could only come back ten minutes before my initial death which means that every time I won't be able to do anything about it and my father is doomed to kill himself.
I realized I've been there for far too long and took off running to my house with only the hope that my father hadn't done it yet.
Luckily I wasn't too far away and in a short while I arrived.
I opened the already unlocked door to see a tall figure that seemed like my father.
I take a step forward but stumble over something. Glancing down I freeze — it's my body.
I turn back up to see the figure already facing me, a wide grin stretching across his face.
I take a step back, but he lunges at me.
He pins me to the ground, overpowering whatever strength I can muster in my mother's body
This clearly isn't my father. I force the words out: 'What are you?
He seemed shocked for a moment and I take the opportunity to get loose and push it off me and run into where I had put the gun I was going to use on myself.
I scramble to find it, but it's gone.
That thing in my father's body chased me down, now standing in the doorway, blocking my only escape.
With that same grin, it says, 'Looking for this?'—flashing the gun, covered in blood, in its hand.
It hit me then: the weapon my father used to end his life was the same one that should've ended mine.
Fear gripped me as I asked, 'Why are you doing this to my family?'
For just a moment, its grin faltered, as if it had realized something, but then it returned. 'What number is this for you?' it asked."
I tensed, knowing it was asking about my rebirths. But how? How did it know I had been reborn… multiple times?
I asked, 'How do you know about that?
"You see some kind of creature after you die, don't you?" it asked, its voice smooth. "The one bringing you back to life again and again, right?"
How does he know about that? I thought.
"Yes," I said clearly.
His grin vanished completely. "You shouldn't trust it," he said, voice low and serious.
"Why no—"
BANG.
Before I could finish, it shot me.
Once again, I'm back in the quiet space—no pain, no noise, nothing to worry about. At least for a little while.
And as soon as the calm faded, I saw it again—the creature.
Although I thought it was helping me before, what that thing in my father's body said stuck with me.
The choice should be clear: don't trust it, keep trying to stop it. But then again… why should I trust either of them?
Obviously, I want to defeat one of them. And the other has helped me more… but I don't really know anything about it. So why should I trust it?
There's only one thing I can do: use the creature for now. It's the only reason I can keep being reborn… and eventually, I'll defeat them both.