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The Extra, the System, and the Returned Villain: An Impossible Escape

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Synopsis
Would you trade your current life for a world straight out of a novel? Before you get excited about swords and magic, let me paint you a picture: here you'll find a hero whose armor looks like it was ripped from bad fanfiction, a villain with a Nostradamus complex and a penchant for messing with the future , gods with marketing strategies worthy of a cult leader, demons with an insatiable appetite for other people's drama, and monsters with a rather... aggressive evolutionary menu. Our protagonist, Alex, a former waiter with a deep appreciation for his $80 weekly salary and his free weekends, had his answer crystal clear: "Not on your life!" He loved his average life, far away from heroes with "plot armor" (what the heck is that?) and villains with temporal existential crises. But the universe, it seems, has a terrible sense of humor. After witnessing a peculiar "direct Isekai shipping" incident right in front of his eyes, Alex finds himself stranded in this chaotic fantasy world, courtesy of a "System" with the subtlety of a fire alarm and a constant demand of "Alex, go cook, I'm hungry!". Caught between a hero with a predestined fate and a villain who knows it all too well, Alex has only one goal: to desperately find the "Return Home" button. His master plan: to blend in, avoid any plot that smells like "saving the world," and above all, keep his precious sleep schedule intact. However, in a world where destiny seems to have a strange fixation on him and a hungry System constantly pushes him into action, the average "extra" life he so craves might be the biggest fantasy of all. Will Alex manage to escape this pandemonium of light novel clichés, or will he end up being the most sarcastic (and best cook) supporting character in this disastrous Isekai?
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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1: An Average Life is Best

What is life? A question everyone asks themselves, and everyone answers in different ways. Some people I've asked say that life is for having: (money, love, family, experiences, destiny).

(Everyone has different ways of living life, so you might be asking yourself why I'm asking such a philosophical question.....)

In a restaurant, there was a guy waiting on customers at a table who were a bit drunk, as it was the weekend. That guy in question is me.

I've worked as a waiter for 2 years in this restaurant. I've seen various types of people pass through here, but the people I like serving the least are the drunk ones. The reason?

—Heyyy buddy, bring me another bottle, this one's finished!!! Hic

—Yessss, boy, bring more, there's plenty of money here hic. —Said one of the three men at the table with a strong smell of liquor, and while he continued drinking from his bottle.

—But sir, we are already closing the restaurant, we need you to leave and pay for what you have eaten and drunk.

(Yeah, these people are the hardest to deal with when it comes to getting paid, as they are somewhat irrational, but at least after 30 minutes of talking, I managed to get them to leave. Now it's time to organize the tables, and then I can go home.)

While tidying the tables, I repeat the question I asked myself a while ago:

(What exactly is life for me?)

(Family? Of course, I love my family. I consider them a part of me, I adore them, and at the same time, they are annoying, but that's what makes them important.)

(Love? Eh, well, I haven't had a girlfriend, to be honest. With the number of problems I've seen: infidelities, betrayals, and severe emotional issues, I don't think that's for me. Work is already enough for me; I don't want another burden besides the rent expenses.)

(Money? I suppose it's the most important thing for an average person. You can't live without money, right? I guess you can, but well, I better not ask myself more questions and finish this quickly; tomorrow is my day off.)

1 hour later

~Ufff~

After finishing cleaning and organizing, I'm finally ready to go home. It's 11:06 PM, it's already late, I'll have to pay for a taxi. Oh well, whatever, I'm going to collect my money to leave. While walking to my boss's office, I hum a melody because of my cheerful mood.

Hmmm~(whistle)

I knock on my boss's door.

[Knock Knock]

The door opens, and I see my boss.

—Hooo Alex, you finished already? That was quick, I suppose you want to go to sleep now.

(My boss is a nice person, although a bit stingy sometimes, but in general, he's good to his employees.)

After talking for a while, I receive my pay and leave the restaurant.

The night is cold. While walking, my phone rings, I receive a notification:

{New chapter of The Chosen One and the Returned}

(Wow, it's my favorite novel, there's a new chapter already. Mmm, well, I'll read it later. I'll go to the supermarket to buy food; I don't have much left at home, and it would be a hassle to go tomorrow.) While thinking, I managed to find a taxi to take me to the supermarket. It's already night, this city is dangerous. Well, what city isn't dangerous at night? While getting into the taxi, I started browsing my phone.

I started reading the new chapter. The novel is about something that has been trendy these years: powerful villains and heroes with destinies. (To be honest, I don't like this novel, but I've read so many that I really can't find anything interesting to read. The truth is, I've been reading novels for 7 years, and they all go the same way: the path to the top of the strongest,)

(or creating a harem on a universal level with various races of beautiful women, with perfect curves, with a beauty that defies the heavens.)

(Sigh ~)

(During this time, I realized that those heroes or villains seek to climb to the top of the strongest because they want to be free or save the world or to protect their harem, etc.)

(But the truth is, it's quite sad to live a life where you'll never see the top, and if you do, it simply ends or you conquer the universe, or there are simply no more chapters because the author burned out their brain because they didn't know how to carry the plot and decided to write another novel.)

(It's really regrettable that good stories never have an ending, or they just give such a boring ending that it loses the meaning of the entire plot in general, but anyway, I'm no one to criticize the works that others put effort into writing, but I've always wondered:)

(Would I be able to survive in those worlds?)

(Mmmmm, the answer would be no, to be honest. The reason is quite simple:)

(When powerful beings fight, their fight causes a lot of damage, and most of the extra characters who die aren't even mentioned, and even the authors forget to put how many died or were injured by their fights or disputes over who has the biggest ego. So, if you ask me, would you change your current life to go to another world with magic?, I would say:)

(Give the opportunity to someone else, I love my current life.)

(A Monday to Friday job with a salary of $80 a week, 2 days off plus tips that would be approximately $100 is heaven for me!!!!)

(I praised my life in my heart.)

[Brake]

While I was thinking, the car braked.

—We've arrived —said the driver as I got out and went to buy something to eat tomorrow. I continued reading the chapter of the novel.

{The hero who is destined to save the world faces against the one who stole his destiny and those people who were destined for him in the first place.}

(Hahaha, seriously, they NTR'd the hero? Well, I guess it doesn't count if he didn't know they were his in the first place.)

{You damn William, you stole my wives and my artifacts, you damn rat! I knew I should have killed you in that timeline when we were kids!!!!}

{Tsk, calm down, my dear friend Eldric, they are just minor things. With your luck, you'll find more significant things, or well, if I don't take them from you first —said William with a smile that didn't reach his eyes.}

{To be continued}

(What the hell! Seriously, the chapter ends here? Because the hero Eldric remembered previous timelines weren't erased after the villain returned? Damn it, I have to wait another week!).

While passing through the shelves and putting things in my cart, I already had everything I needed for a weekend of eating:

Eggs

Beer

Canned meats

Cheese

Flour, rice, noodles

Milk

Sweets and cereals

Among other things. With everything ready, now I'm going home. I go to the cashier and pay, leave the store, and walk home.

While walking, someone runs out of a nearby alley not far from me.

{Finally, I'm back on Earth!!!! I won't be in that hell anymore now--- before}

I could understand what that person was shouting, something pulls me from behind into the alley, and while my gaze is forward, I see that the guy who was shouting is run over by a truck The last thing I thought before falling into darkness was

(That guy just got sent straight to an isekai!!!)