| May POV |
I stare at the ceiling, phone pressed to my ear, listening to it ring. And ring. And ring.
"Come on, Dad, pick up. Please. Please."
Rotom floats nervously nearby, eyeing the coffee table like it's debating whether to add another zero to our debt chart. Combusken's in the corner, trying to peck one of Null's leg plates like she thinks it's a food dispenser. Null just stands there, dead inside. Same, buddy.
The ringing stops. I sit up straight, hope flaring for half a second.
And then — voicemail.
"Hi! You've reached Birch. I'm either busy with a research or wrangling my boot out of Poochyena's maw. Leave a message and I'll get back to you!"
I want to scream. I really do.
Beep.
"Hey, Dad. It's me. Again. Um…" I glance at Rio, who is still sulking by the window like some tragic anime villain, black spikes gleaming in the moonlight, pink fur catching the light in a way that should not be intimidating but somehow is.
"Yeah, so… things are fine. Totally fine. I'm not having a crisis. Nope. Not at all."
I sigh and flop back down, staring at the phone.
"Anyway, if you could maybe send, like, emergency funds? Or a guidebook on how to handle a Lucario that looks like it crawled out of a horror manga? That'd be great. Okay. Love you. Bye."
I hang up and immediately faceplant into the nearest pillow.
"Done?" Rio asks, voice dripping with sarcasm.
"No," I mumble into the pillow. "I'm gonna call my mom next. Then Uncle Norman. Then the entire League if I have to."
Rotom zips in, way too cheerful. "Or I could draft a GoFundMe page! Title idea: Trainer May Needs Help Rehabilitating Her Emo Lucario — Donate Today!"
I groan louder.
And of course — that's when someone knocks at the door.
Rio POV
My grand future... My world domination plans... All ruined because of some dumb design choice...
I sigh for what feels like the hundredth time today, arms crossed, leaning against the window frame like I'm in some edgy poster for a band nobody listens to. Still trying to acclimate to this taller build. Gotta admit — being over six feet is a blessing. No more getting patted on the head like some kid's plushie.
But at what cost?
I glance at my reflection in the glass. The black spikes? Cool. The carbon-steel vibe? Chef's kiss. The red fur? Fine, I can work with that.
But the pink. The pink.
I look like the ghost of Princess bublegum.
There's another knock at the door.
"May! You gonna get that?" I call, not moving an inch. My aura sensors twitch as I feel a familiar presence outside.
She lifts her head from the pillow just enough to glare at me. "You're the one with the scary new form. You go. Maybe they'll take one look and run away."
Before I can argue, Combusken waddles over, somehow convinced this is her job now. She pecks the door handle.
Fine. I guess I'll do it. And I also have to teach you how to use your arms now...
I push off the wall, my steps heavier now, the floorboards creaking like they know something terrible is about to happen. I reach for the knob — it looks so much smaller now in my bigger hands — and open the door.
"Sup." I greet lazily, leaning on the doorframe like this isn't the most cursed evolution in Hoenn history.
Roxanne freezes, her hand still on the gift basket — and then her eyes light up. Like, actual sparkles. Like she just discovered a rare fossil or a new type of rock.
"Oh. My. Arceus, look at you!" she breathes, stepping forward, completely forgetting the basket as it tips and berries scatter across the floor. "This is incredible! The coloration, the energy signature, the sheer presence—I didn't even know Lucario could look like this!"
I blink. "…You're not horrified?"
She looks offended I'd even ask. "Are you kidding? You look amazing. Like a final boss. The colour contrast is so striking—those black spikes? The red fur? The pink hue? It's like an ancient warlord crossed with a cursed relic! I love it!"
I glance at Combusken, who's watching with wide eyes like she can't believe Roxanne's buying this nightmare fuel as cool. And Ralts who is nodding as if she just found a kindred spirit.
"A bit of an exaggeration no?"
Combusken waddles over and pecks my shin again. Traitor.
Roxanne kneels, gathering berries without taking her eyes off me. "Not at all, you do look cool, of by the way, I came to check in after the, uh, lab incident. And I wanted to drop this off…" She waves vaguely at the gift basket. "But wow, Rio. Just — wow. Can I take pictures? Maybe sketch you? Do you mind?"
Behind me, May groans into her pillow. "Tell her to bring coffee next time…"
Rotom floats in, camera lens gleaming. "Uploading new entry: Trainer May's Lucario — Slateport Gym Leader Declares '10/10, Would Battle Again'!"
I rub my temples. "Sure, Roxanne. Knock yourself out. Just don't post it on PokéNet. I've suffered enough today."
Roxanne grins, actually grins, and pulls out a little notebook. "Deal. But you have to spar me before you leave town. I need to see this in action."
"You lost pretty badly the last time, you sure you want to go for a second round now that I can shrug off all you Pokémons' attacks?"
"Absolutely!"
I sigh. "Fine. But I'm charging for autographs."
She laughs, gathers her basket, and backs off toward the hall. "See you later guys, May, I won't forget the coffee next time! And seriously, you rock this look RIo."
I close the door behind her and glance at Combusken.
"Lesson one: arms. We start tomorrow."
She pecks the door again, just because.
I sigh, flop back onto the bunk, and let my head hit the pillow like a man defeated by fate itself. Combusken's victorious little door peck echoes in my mind like a taunt. Tomorrow, I promise myself. Tomorrow she learns.
My eyes drift to my status screen as I swipe it open, needing something to distract me from the existential crisis that is my colour palette.
[Name:] Rio
[Race:] Lucario - Cursed Beast Form
[Nature:] Adamant
[Level:] 20
[Abilities:]
Inner Focus (prevents flinching)
Prankster (priority to status moves)
Anticipation (senses foe's move)
(New) Justified (Boosts Attack when exposed to Dark/Ghost energy)
[Move Set:] Hidden
[New Moves: Aura sphere, Force Palm, JumpJutsu]
[Stats:]
HP: 70
Attack: 120
Defence: 73
Sp. Atk: 95
Sp. Def: 70
Speed: 140
[Items:] Hidden
I stare at that Speed stat for a long moment.
140.
"…Holy hell," I mutter under my breath.
I'm fast. Like, really fast. Like, one of the fastest things alive fast. And I can feel it, almost as if time itself was making way for me when I move. And to be fair, Dragonite, a pokemon with a base 60 speed can circle the planet in less than a day.
I squint, doing mental math.Ninjask? Sure, that bug's still faster, but barely. Electrode? Dodrio? Talonflame? I'm right there with 'em.
Top ten of all Pokémon ranked by Speed.
A slow grin spreads across my face, fangs glinting in the moonlight from the window.
Okay, maybe the pink isn't so bad. If I can outrun my embarrassment, does it even count?
But I really need to bump up my Special attack if I'm going to be spamming Cleaves and Divine Arrows left and right...
Welp, guess its time for training montage number 2.
Word Count: 1270
I think Roxanne failed Pokémon battle theory in this AU.
MC: I know I'm strong, but why'd you say that?
A Fighting/Steel/Ghost type with Ground immunity? Not to mention the only heavy-hitting move that might tickle you is Hyper Beam. And you be immune immune to that, too.