Jay's POV
My body felt like it had been crushed beneath a thousand bricks. Each breath came with fire licking the inside of my ribs. The lights above were too white, too sterile like everything was pretending to be okay when it clearly wasn't.
But the first thing I saw was him.
Keifer.
His head was bowed beside the bed, his hand wrapped tightly around mine like it was the only thread keeping him from falling. I could hear the quiet way he sniffled, trying to hide it. I felt the way his fingers trembled against my palm.
It hurt more than the bullet ever did.
I wanted to tell him I was okay. That I was alive. That I didn't die like he must've feared I would.
So I forced myself to speak.
"Keif…"
He looked up instantly, like my voice was gravity. His eyes—bloodshot, wide, wet—snapped to mine. And when he saw I was awake, something cracked inside him.
"Jay," he whispered. "Oh my god, Jay."
He pressed his forehead to my hand like a silent prayer. His entire body shook as he tried to hold it in. But I could see the tears fall anyway.
I reached up, weak and slow, and cupped his cheek. "You're crying."
He gave a small laugh, but it cracked halfway. "No, I'm not," he lied.
"Don't lie," I whispered. "It's me."
And that's when I tried to sit up.
The second I moved my body just a tiny shift I felt the pain shoot through me like lightning. My eyes squeezed shut, breath catching.
But the worst part?
I couldn't feel my legs.
My heart slammed into my ribs, panic flaring in my throat. I tried again. Harder. Nothing. I shifted the blanket, staring at the motionless weight beneath it.
Keifer noticed the change in my expression. "What? What's wrong?"
I swallowed the terror and forced a smile. "Nothing… just sore."
He frowned, not convinced, but nodded slowly. "Let me call the nurse. I'll tell the others too, okay? They're all going crazy out there."
I nodded. My hand fell from his as he left the room, and the second the door closed—I broke.
Panic. Cold and thick. My fingers curled into the sheets as I tried again.
Move.
Please move.
I clenched my jaw, stared at my legs like I could command them.
Nothing.
Tears welled in my eyes. Not from the pain. Not from the fear of what happened to me. But from the horrible truth settling in the pit of my stomach—
What if I couldn't walk again?
The door burst open.
Cin rushed in like a whirlwind, his voice cracking like a kid's. "Jay!"
He was crying, full-on sobbing, as he grabbed my hand and held it against his cheek. "You idiot! You absolute idiot! You scared the crap out of all of us!"
I tried to smile, to comfort him, but I was too shaken. "Cin…"
"I thought we lost you," he whispered.
But before I could say anything, the nurse came in and gently pulled him back. "Let me check her vitals first, sweetie. You can stay close, but give me some space, okay?"
Cin wiped his face, sniffled hard, and nodded. He stepped back, still hovering like I might vanish again.
The nurse placed the cold stethoscope to my chest, checked the machines, then gently lifted the blanket covering my lower half.
I couldn't take it anymore.
"Miss nurse…" I croaked, throat dry. "Why can't I feel my legs?"
She froze.
Her eyes darted to mine.
"I-I can't move my feet. Or anything. Why can't I move them?"
Her face softened. She put the chart down.
"I'm going to call the doctor, Jay, okay? Just stay calm."
I nodded—but everything inside me was anything but calm.
From the door, I could hear voices. Footsteps. The rest of them were out there—Aries, Percy. My brothers. My people, section E.
They tried to come in.
But the nurse stopped them. "Please, not right now. Just wait."
Keifer's voice pierced the hallway. "Why? What's going on? Someone tell me what's wrong!"
She didn't answer.
Seconds felt like years before the doctor arrived. He nodded at the nurse, then moved straight to my bedside. His voice was kind, but distant like he was trying not to say too much too soon.
He checked my reflexes.
Left leg.
Right leg.
My toes.
Nothing moved.
Not even a twitch.
I stared at him as my eyes filled with tears I couldn't blink away.
I was crying before I even realized it.
He gently patted my arm. "I'll speak with everyone," he said, and turned toward the door.
I could hear the shuffle of feet just outside as the door opened.
"What's wrong?" Aries demanded.
"Is she okay?" Percy asked.
"Tell us now," Yuri added.
But it was Keifer's voice that broke me. Quiet. Fragile. "Please… just tell me she's okay."
The doctor spoke softly. "She's stable. The surgery was successful. But…" He took a breath. "It's possible she's experiencing paralysis in her legs. The trauma was intense, and sometimes the body reacts by shutting down. We believe it's temporary. A reaction to shock. It may last a few days, maybe longer. But she will recover."
Silence.
No one spoke.
The air outside that door might as well have cracked in half.
And then I heard Keifer's footsteps.
He didn't come in.
He didn't ask more questions.
He just walked away.
Didn't say a word.
Didn't scream or cry or ask me if I was okay.
He just left.
My heart shattered.
Not because I blamed him.
But because I knew what that silence meant.
Keifer was breaking. And he didn't want me to see.