Rental Dues.
College Fees.
Loan Repayments.
And the basic finance to eat at least once a day.
That was all that ruled Camellia's world.
A never-ending cycle of debts and dues that kept piling higher and higher, until they suffocated the very happiness out of an individual.
It was a merciless massacre of a person's peaceful mindset, an endless ocean of sorrow which drowned you, until you couldn't breathe- couldn't take a break, lost the hope to live a little.
The dark bags under her eyes had become larger over the past three months. Her usual, immaculate image had been reduced to a messy, shaken persona that worked three, tiring shifts in a single day.
After work, she would return to her small, 2-bedroom apartment late at night, utterly exhausted, and take a warm watered bath to relax her nerves and gather her thoughts.
She wanted to let it all go, to drown beneath the bliss of this warm water, and just...disappear.
But, she couldn't.
How else would she manage to pay those goddamn fees, and support her little brother's education?
After all, he had no one but her to rely on.
She was his only emotional support, his best friend, and guardian. Everything that Camellia did was just for her brother, to give him the joy and happiness of life that she couldn't enjoy.
To ensure that his life would be nothing like hers.
He would live a comfortable life- not knowing the meaning of stress or guilt.
But even Camellia knew that this would never be entirely possible.
Her brother still had those nightmares, memories of a past that she wished could be forgotten. The split-second terror as the bus crashed into the car, the sound of windows shattering into small, bloody diamonds, and the colors of sirens as she struggled to drag them out of the broken window. She remembered how she dragged her brother out, how she struggled to free her parents from their collapsed seats.
The sorrowful, pained smile on their faces as they told her that they would always love her.
To save her brother and run, find help.
To be strong.
Just seconds before the car exploded into pieces, the fire raging fiercely among the dark, night sky.
Late at night, she would still hear the sound of sniffling coming from his bedroom, see a tear or two escape from his closed eyes. She would stroke his hair, hug him, and tell him that it would be alright.
That it was time to move on. And that she would always be there for him.
On these nights, as Camellia hugged her little brother and lullabied him to sleep, she would feel a pang of jealousy.
Her brother was lucky.
He had the liberty to show his sorrow, to be vulnerable and cry without a single worry. He had someone to support him, to encourage him, whereas she had to stay strong and ignore all those times she wanted to burst into tears and cry her heart out.
How Camellia longed for a shoulder to cry on.
For someone- anyone, to tell her that she didn't have to be so strong every single time. That she was allowed to show her pain to others, that she didn't always have to carry these burdens, that she could just take a moment and breathe a little.
But those memories...
That heart-breaking guilt and pain...
It was something that only she should carry, and Camellia knew it.
Maybe...just maybe, if she had reached out to them one last time...
This sorrow would be more bearable.
Tonight was no different.
Camellia
With a yawn, I opened the door to my apartment, glancing at the dimly-lit room before flinging my bag onto the couch and flopping down beside it. I closed my eyes with a heavy sigh, massaging my temples lazily.
What a dull day at work. Utterly boring.
I wish I could just politely smack my manager in the face, with a free kick to the stomach.
The only thing that makes working in that damn cafe bearable is the above-average salary, and of course- my loyal friends.
I stood up and walked to the bedroom, peeking inside hesitantly. Like every other night, my brother was sleeping soundly, probably exhausted by his day at school just like I was.
"I'm sorry I'm late",
I muttered, before she tucking him into bed and kissing him goodnight- a kiss filled with a thousand apologies. Then I glanced around his room and rolled my eyes.
"What a messy little brat."
With a barely noticeable smirk, I dragged my body around the room, flinching at the painful cramps in my legs.
I somehow cleaned up most of it, smiling at the little crayon drawings that I usually find scattered on the floor. What a creative brother I have.
I'll never let him bear any burden.
He deserves a perfect life.
I shook my head and opened the bathroom door, launching myself into a relaxing bath, my mind blank and eyes closed as I felt the comforting warmth engulf me completely. A soft sigh escaped my lips. I trembled slightly, pulling my knees closer to my chest and resting my forehead upon them.
It would be the same thing tomorrow.
The same routine, repeated over and over again until I lost myself among the sheer business of my schedule.
First dropping my brother off, then attending college, then the pizza place, picking my brother up, assisting the mall, and finally- the night shift as a waiter at a cafe.
With luck, I'll finally complete those scientific research assignments by tomorrow. I can't afford another late submission again.
I must get the top scores to find a job with remarkable salary and a merciful schedule.
That way, I'll be able to spend more time with my brother. To help him with his homework. Watch TV with him.
You know, those small simple things.
I stepped out of the bath, feeling the hot water slide down my body, leaving chills in their wake as goosebumps spread across my skin, earning me a small shiver. I wore some comfortable shorts and a hoodie before lying down on the bed, covering myself with a blanket for some much needed comfort, and grabbing a pack of those ready-to-eat noodles for myself.
I tiredly unlocked my phone, scrolling through a day's worth of messages while taking small bites of those delicious noodles.
Rental due notifications,
assignment reminders,
task schedules flooded the screen.
I blatantly ignored, like the way we all ignore notifications, until my thumb stopped at one particular message, sent by a close friend of mine.
Something about his relative's going on vacation and wanting a mansion supervisor.
Not as interesting as I thought.
However, the very next second, as I spotted the bottom of the message, I gasped, my eyes widening, as I noticed how much they were paying.
200$ an hour?! For three weeks?
I quickly calculated the total amount, my fingers trembling slightly.
100,800$...A hundred thousand and eight hundred dollars..
This boy had some damn rich relatives.
Not that I was complaining.
After all, this would definitely solve all my problems.
I can support my brother's dream, and maybe...just maybe, I can give a shot at finding happiness for myself.
"Looks like I'm getting a new job," I said, grinning happily.