I was trapped in a fragile body. The first thing I did was seek knowledge beyond what I already had. I went to the house's library. Judging by the dust, I could tell the place wasn't visited often.
I was calm. Everything had been unexpected. I hadn't expected to reincarnate, much less to come back as a human. Maybe this was what people called divine punishment or something like that.
Even though my family was considered poor, I wasn't going hungry, and there was some comfort in our home.
Books helped me a lot. I was able to gather some important information. In this world, there's a system called magic, which is different from the one in my world, where we use spiritual energy to create supernatural phenomena. Here, the energy used comes from all living beings and the atmosphere itself. That energy is called mana.
From what I understood, some humans begin to manifest control over mana around the age of ten. Some take longer, and in rare cases, it happens earlier. But those people are a minority. Not everyone is capable of using mana. Another difference from the system I knew, since back then all it took was training for someone to use spiritual energy. I'm not sure if that's good or bad, but it's interesting to see the differences.
With that, I was sure I was in another world, which was strange, because as a human I could destroy other humans from the inside, but apparently there's no similar problem here like there was in my old world.
My calmness bothered me. I should've been nervous or scared, but I didn't know how to react. At the same time, everything felt somewhat natural. Maybe because of the memories I had from this world. I just didn't understand why I was only remembering them now.
I stuck to the same routine I was supposed to have in this world, but I always snuck into the library to read a few books. I started with the basics. Historical books to understand political divisions and geography. Then I decided to learn a bit about magic and military tactics.
Military tactics were practically the same as in my world. Only a few things had changed, and the weapons were the same, just with different names. Probably because I was reading them in another language. But magic was very different. Some concepts I couldn't grasp. No matter how much I tried the exercises, the most I managed was a small flame that lasted less than two seconds. I kept studying, but I didn't feel like I was making progress. It made sense that I failed, since the books said people could only start manipulating mana after the age of ten.
Then I remembered. I never even tried using my spiritual energy. I had been so focused on learning something new that I'd forgotten I was already a master in spiritual practices. My energy core was at the highest level, gold level.
I'd also failed when trying to make a fireball. Only a tiny spark came out, but it was enough to burn some dry leaves. Luckily, I was quick and managed to stop a possible fire. Apparently, I was better at magic than at something I had once been an expert in. This body really was a prison.
The books were either wrong about the age at which people begin to manipulate mana, or my knowledge of spiritual energy made things easier for me. Still, I wasn't able to manipulate it the way I used to. Maybe it's just a matter of time, or maybe this body came with some sort of factory defect. Wouldn't be surprising, since I'm human now.
I kept training for a few more weeks. I did it in secret from my parents and siblings. Having a mage in the family could change the line of succession. Even though we were poor, that could still cause problems. My siblings weren't dangerous, but Caldor, my oldest brother, might feel offended for losing his position to the youngest. So I had to be careful.
Maybe I was being too cautious, but I didn't want to take any risks.
I could already make small fireballs using both magic and spiritual energy, but I was stronger with magic, which made me curious.
I had a strict routine. I'd wake up, eat breakfast with my family, then go to a clearing to train until lunchtime. In the afternoon, I'd read books and meditate. That helped me control mana better and also strengthened my spiritual power.
At some point, it all started to feel redundant. I was training two different things that would be used in the same way. So I stopped studying magic and focused on strengthening my spiritual power. Progress was slower compared to studying magic, but I felt more affinity with it.
After two months, I got frustrated and decided to go back to studying magic and gave up my spiritual practices. My lack of progress was discouraging. So I decided I would become a mage.
I was training in secret so I could grow strong and one day explore this world and maybe find a way back to my own. Staying in this house wouldn't get me anywhere. There'd be nothing left for me. That's why I had to become strong and conquer whatever I wanted.
Besides that, I needed to learn more about this world. Knowledge is a powerful weapon.
My sixth birthday came. I didn't have a party or anything like that. Not that I wanted one. I'd had plenty of birthdays in my previous life, so I was fine without it.
Caldor was acting strange. He seemed like he was watching me. He couldn't hide it. I knew he was watching. I didn't know why. Maybe he'd seen me doing something he didn't like and just wanted to scold me.
I waited a few days, but he kept watching me while he was at home. When I wasn't around, he asked my other siblings about me. I found out when Luna asked what I was doing while hiding. Eventually, his persistence faded. He just gave up. That made me more relaxed, and little by little I stopped thinking about what reason he had to be following me.
Days went by and I got used to having my family around. My father was a bit strict. He wasn't the kind of man who talked to his children. He only paid attention to the two oldest. But my mother was kind. I'd say she was almost an angel. Gentle and always calm. I wonder what made her marry my father.
My older brother was a copy of our father. He spent his days training with a sword. My father had once been a royal knight and earned a noble title after protecting a duke from an attack, but he stayed poor. He ended up with more bureaucratic responsibilities, so that promotion only brought loss.
My second brother was also hard to deal with. He always kept to himself and only talked to Caldor, who helped him with sword training. Then came my sister and my other brother. We were only three and two years apart, so we got along well, even though I'd been a terrible brother, always hiding somewhere to train.
My training was paying off, but I was still weak. Which was expected for a six-year-old. Even so, I believed I could at least try to defend myself or someone else, if needed. At least I thought I had enough strength for that, though Caldor could already handle someone who tried to attack us.
"Liam, do you want to train swords with me tomorrow?"
That was unexpected. He rarely talked to me, and there were other brothers before me.
But I accepted. In my previous life, I was an excellent swordsman. Maybe even better than the great hero. Though I never had any desire to test our strength.
It would be good to train my body to use swords, since that would be another way to defend myself. During my magic training, I would take short breaks to do some exercises, even if it didn't seem like it.
I woke up early and my brother was already sitting at the table. We had breakfast and went outside, but he wanted us to train somewhere else. He picked me up and placed me on a horse, then quickly climbed up behind me. He moved so fast I didn't even notice.
It took a few minutes to reach a mountain. At first, I didn't understand why we were there, but then I saw the view and understood. It was beautiful. The air felt purer. The vegetation brought me a sense of peace. I liked it, even though the feeling bothered me somehow.
Then I felt a hand on my back. The shock made me take two steps forward, and when I turned around, I saw a sadistic smile on my brother's face. He pushed me off the mountain.