Rationality is usually my motto. The irrational is simply our imaginations toying with us. Atleast, that was my opinion. See, all different types of things are simply describable as just that- Irrational. Like, wanting a truck hitting you would probably be irrational. Or praying for someone to lose everything in their life would also be irrational.
The situation I found myself in could also only be described as simply 'irrational'. I could feel, yet I couldn't. I could see, yet I couldn't. All I saw was both white and black. Yet the both of them never mixed, either, which was also irrational.
I couldn't feel time, either, so I simply sat there for what felt like hours waiting for something, anything to happen that would tell me just what was going on. Finally, after what felt like at least 9 days, I felt that gripping feeling again, of my heart not pumping anymore, as I seemed to go through death again.
*
Slowly but steadily, I was able to feel again. The first thing I felt was chill. It was chilly. How? I thought I was dead. Then, I was able to hear again. I heard what sounded like muffled talking, in some other language. No clue what was being said.
Then, I opened my eyes. Like that one scene from Mushoku Tensei, I saw quite a handful of people. A blue haired cat girl, a middle aged blonde woman, and a decently young boy with a singular tear of what looked like dried ink almost dripping from his eye.
"Ackla (that's) Eln(a) Hoy(boy) Gratz(congrats)!" said the middle aged blondie, with the young, black haired boy nodding softly behind her. "Il(it) nag(is), Il(it) nag(is)." He said, before pointing behind me. "Franz, hue(you) ald(should) tunt(take) qe(the) hoy." the black haired boy said, as the sound of shifting tussled into my ears.
A brown-ish blonde-ish man with relatively tan skin walked towards me, picking me up and looking at me. As I stared at his features, I could tell that he definitely would have been the protagonist of some super lewd eroge game. He was generally insanely handsome, with a very defined build.
If this was like Tensura, it seemed the "system" mechanic finally kicked in, as I was able to understand my first words in this world. "You are my son… Zachery…"
Then, as if to spite me for even remotely thinking that I'd be able to have a break, even in my second life, whatever language this was stopped being auto translated, and I remained in my seemingly ever lasting confusion.
He passed me back to my mother after a few seconds, as I stared at her as well. She was a beautiful woman, with skin around the same tone as my father. Nothing in the chest department though, though that doesn't ever remove from a woman's beauty…!
She stared at me for a few seconds quietly, before tilting her head. "Unt (aren't) hehe's (baby's) unposen (supposed) ta (to) qit (cry)?" She said, with a nervous look on her face. Whatever she said, it was probably bad. I mean, that facial expression kinda just gives it away…! I'm sorry, new mom, I swear I'm not a pervert…! Just a degenerate fujoshi…!
The cat girl walked towards my new mother, looking awfully adorable in her clearly oversized sweater, and began to speak as well, in the same language I couldn't understand for the life of me (get it, because this is my second life? Okay, I'll stop now. I'm sorry.)
"Eut (some) haln (just) wiet (don't)-nya, ma'am. Hij (give) qe hoy eut guk (time.),nya"
She said, bowing softly before holding me equally as softly. Her facial features express constant calm, and insane amounts of laid backness that the previous me just WISHES she could engage in. The cat girl holds me close to her chest, as I feel my maiden spirit blushing slightly.
Squirming a little, and whining a bit gets her to hand me back to my mother, albeit sadly. Jesus, those things were like mounds! Stop putting me to shame, woman! Let my wounds simmer and die out, damn it!
As my mother holds me, she smiles softly, rubbing my small cheek with her finger, as I open my mouth softly. "Zachary." she repeats after my father, nodding, as I feel an oddly familiar feeling. Hunger. As if on queue, completely against my will, by the way, I begin to wail, showing my hunger.
My mothers face contorts to one of shock, before she smiles softly, almost as if she already understands what it is I want or need. Popping out one of her small breasts, she…
Do you think I'm gonna give you any more information than that? Ew! Fuck you, pervert.
See, the one problem with being a baby, is that you can't control anything. And here I am, falling asleep as soon as my mom starts feeding me. Just how am I supposed to build up any info in order to survive?! First, I fucking reincarnate, second, I get shafted into a world where I'm a boy, and now I can't even control when I fucking sleep! How wondrous.
*
A handful of weeks had passed, probably 6 or 7 if I had to make a worthwhile guess. I would like to act as if I had learnt something, but I didn't. All I knew, right now, was simply that I had a large band of misfits in my house.
Well, no. To say I haven't learnt anything is simply a lie. I have learnt some things. For one, the blonde older lady? That's my grandma, on my fathers side. My mothers family is nowhere to be seen. Her name is Maisie.
If I remember correctly, the catgirl is known as a 'Cat Summoned Maid'. It's fairly odd, considering that's one of the few things translated into japanese. Maybe it's just the great sage finally helping me again?
Essentially, she's not real. The only way she'll ever become real is if she finds a suitor who truly loves her. Although, it seems my family isn't in much of a rush to find a suitor for her, which is odd considering they seem to like her an awful lot.
Maybe my fathers a perverted scumbag who likes sleeping with his cat maid? That'd be quite disgusting, and NTR. None of either, please.
The black haired boy was also a spirit. Although, he was a much "stronger" spirit. A helldae. Short for Hell Daemon. For now, I hadn't exactly seen him do much. But, as a spirit, he was immortal. The same logic applied for the catgirl. Their names are both Maria and Kiki. Maria is the catgirl, while Kiki is the black haired boy.
There wasn't much for me to do, except laying there and just watching as the band of misfits I now had to call my family living their daily life. At Least coffee still exists in this world, alongside books. The two things I needed more than anything else, as a (now ex) fujoshi and a work-a-holic.
Maisie fucking adores coffee. Like, she drinks it at least 5 times a day, and still somehow manages to tuck herself into bed and fall asleep like an absolute champ. You have to give people respect sometimes, even if it's for the stupidest things.
Kiki and Franz could only be described as complete muscle heads. If they weren't working out, they were sleeping or eating. Sometimes, though, Kiki sat down and read, which seemed surprising since he seemed like a "Chuunibyou" type. Didn't think he'd pick up a book that wasn't a Shonen manga or something.
As my mother held me softly, I couldn't help but feel at peace. I had long forgotten the feeling of a mothers love and warmth, considering my own mother had died when I was in middle school. That was a dark time, but I begrudgingly got over it.
As I held my small hands out to my mother, she giggled softly and spoke, although I couldn't understand her, much to my discrepancy.
"Hund (Look) ilt (at) chu (you). Unt chu haln qe uhndrist (cutest)?"
If I could tilt my head, I would.
*
Okay. 7 months passed, relatively quickly too. I had recently regained the ability to crawl. And nothing, and I mean nothing will stop me from exploring and learning the layout of this utterly humongous house.
Right now, I learnt where the laundry room was. I spent quite an awfully long amount of time playing around with the water, because I think the child-like influence it had on my brain literally made the idea of a substance like water nigh irresistible to me in terms of wanting to play with it.
I also got in trouble for crawling around the house with a pair of panties on my head. I'm not going to say anything, but…
Anyways, I had also learnt where the library was. There was only one thing I was able to actually recognize; the year in one of the books: 1867. Well, there was also what seems like a country, or more so a continent.
'Continente degli angeli'
It sounded Italian or Spanish, but at the same time, I didn't learn those languages in school. Only English and Japanese. I recognized absolutely nothing about the country, nor the language, and I'm utterly lost and confused, with no one to help me.
Am I just this unlucky, or am I purely being spited? Maybe this is some sort of twisted punishment for being a degenerate in my previous life and not talking about it..
This was relatively… No, this life is seeming extremely, extremely boring. I'm literally unknowing, and the LORD knows when I'll finally be taught something. This fucking sucks…