The broom slipped from Li Wei's fingers and clattered onto the sect's polished stone floor. Again.
He sighed, rubbing his sore lower back as he bent to retrieve it. Another day, another mountain of disciple laundry to scrub, floors to mop, and chamber pots to empty. Such was the glamorous life of the lowest-ranked servant in the Verdant Sword Sect—a title he'd held for three miserable years.
*"If I have to clean one more 'mystical artifact' covered in some young master's vomit, I'm jumping into the Beast Pits,"* he thought, not for the first time.
Then the sky screamed.
A sound like shattering glass split the air, and before Li Wei could so much as yelp, a bolt of golden lightning struck him directly between the eyes.
**PAIN.**
His vision whited out. His bones vibrated like plucked harp strings. For one terrifying moment, he was certain he'd died—struck down by the heavens for the crime of *existing too loudly* in a cultivation sect full of people who'd long since forgotten his name.
Then the pain vanished, replaced by a cheerful chime echoing inside his skull.
**[SYSTEM INITIALIZED!]**
**[Congratulations, Host! You have been selected as this era's 'Heaven-Defying War God'!]**
Li Wei blinked. "...What?"
**[Error Detected: Host's cultivation base mismatch.]**
**[Recalibrating…]**
**[Recalibrating…]**
**[…Oh. Oh no.]**
A scroll of glowing text unfurled in his mind's eye:
**HOST STATUS**
Name: Li Wei
Age: 18
Cultivation Realm: Mortal (Unwashed)
Talent: "Please Consider Another Career"
Achievements: "Most Likely To Die Off-Screen"
Li Wei's eye twitched. "Excuse me?!"
**[Do not panic!]** the System announced, as if reading his thoughts. **[This unit has… temporarily miscalculated. But no matter!]**
Another chime. A new message burned itself into his vision:
**[MAIN QUEST: DEFEAT THE DEMON KING]**
**[Time Limit: 30 Days]**
**[Reward: Immortality, Unlimited Power, A Really Nice Hat]**
**[Failure: SYSTEM SELF-DESTRUCT + HOST DEATH]**
Li Wei stared. Then he laughed. Then he choked on his own laughter.
"You—you think *I* can defeat the Demon King? The same Demon King who *ate* the last five Sword Saints? I can't even defeat *morning chores*!"
**[Correction: Host must *fake* defeating the Demon King.]**
**[Additional Objective: Do Not Get Exposed As A Fraud]**
**[Tip: Confidence is key! Also, screaming loudly increases intimidation stats by 300%.]**
Before Li Wei could protest further, a thunderous voice shook the courtyard:
**"WHO DARES AWAKEN THE ANCESTRAL LEYLINE?!"**
Li Wei turned slowly. Behind him, hovering midair in a swirl of righteous qi, stood Sect Elder Zhu, his beard bristling with fury. Dozens of disciples poured into the courtyard, their eyes wide as they took in the scene—the scorch mark where lightning had struck, the golden light still flickering around Li Wei's ragged servant robes…
And the broom in his hand, its bristles gently on fire.
**[SYSTEM NOTICE: Host's first 'legendary moment' has arrived!]**
**[Suggested dialogue: "This meager one apologizes for disturbing your rest… *Elder*." (Add dramatic pause.)]**
Li Wei opened his mouth. What came out was:
"I can explain."
A hush fell over the crowd. Elder Zhu's eyes narrowed.
Then the System pinged again.
**[ACTIVATING 'PROTAGONIST AURA'…]**
The broom in Li Wei's hand *exploded* into a pillar of golden flame.
The disciples gasped. Elder Zhu's jaw dropped.
And Li Wei, still holding the now-mythic-looking flaming broom, realized two things:
1. The System was *absolutely* trying to get him killed.
2. He had exactly one way out of this.
He straightened his back, channeled every scrap of courage he didn't have, and let the System's words roll off his tongue like a seasoned conman:
**"This humble one… has been in seclusion long enough."**
The crowd lost their minds.
Elder Zhu staggered back as if struck. "Y-you—! That aura! That *presence*! You're no servant—you're a *hidden master*!"
Li Wei's soul left his body. The System, helpfully, provided fireworks.
**[ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: 'How Are You Still Alive?!']**
As the disciples kowtowed and the elder babbled about "testing his insight," Li Wei's face settled into what he hoped looked like serene wisdom—and not abject terror.
*Thirty days*, he thought numbly. *Thirty days to either become a legend… or die screaming.*
The System's final message of the day flickered in his vision:
**[Welcome to your new life, Host. Try not to perish!]**
**--- CHAPTER END ---**