A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.
A Big Batch of Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone
Classic One-Liners
Why don't skeletons fight in the army? They don't have the guts.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the scarecrow become a motivational speaker? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack up.
I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Why don't programmers prefer dark mode? Because the light attracts bugs.
I told my friend she drew her eyeliner too thick. She just blinked at me.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
I'm friends with a clock. We go way back.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor.
Why don't bakers loaf around? They're always kneading something.
The picture went to jail because it was framed.
Why did the coffee go to therapy? It had too many "grounds" for anxiety.
I tried to write a pun about the wind, but it just blew away.
What's a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, cow says moo!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Tank. Tank you! I'm here all week.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana split, let's go!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I'm hungry!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut let these jokes pass you by!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don't laugh!
Why did Flash Thompson join the football team? Because he wanted to be a real web-slinger!
What's Spider-Man's favorite day of the week? Web-sday.
Why did Gwen Stacy bring a ladder to school? To take things to the next level with Peter!
What did the Green Goblin say to Spider-Man? "Let's pumpkin-spice things up!"
Why doesn't Doctor Octopus use dating apps? He's got too many arms to swipe right.
What's Venom's favorite snack? Symbi-otes and cream.
Why did MJ start a band? Because she's got all of Peter's heartstrings!
Why does Peter Parker always lose at poker? Because he's got too many webby tells.
What did Aunt May say when Peter came home late? "With great power comes a great curfew!"
Why did the Vulture join a book club? He wanted to wing it with some new stories.
Why did the photon check into a hotel? It was traveling light.
What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder.
Why don't chemists trust atoms? They might be up to something.
Why was the math teacher suspicious? Because the students were plotting something.
What did the biologist wear to impress? Designer genes.
Why did the computer go to therapy? It had an identity crisis after a binary breakup.
What's a physicist's favorite food? Fission chips.
Why don't geologists date? They're too busy breaking rocks.
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed space.
Why did the cow become an artist? Because it had an udderly unique style.
What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot!
Why don't cats play chess? They're afraid of any move with))^54. What's a dog's favorite city? New Yorkie.
Why did the chicken join a band? It had the drumsticks.
What do you call a snake who works for the government? A civil serpent.
Why don't elephants use computers? They're afraid of the mouse.
What's a shark's favorite sci-fi show? Jaws Wars.
Why did the lion quit the circus? It was tired of jumping through hoops.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
Why did the bread go to therapy? It had too many "crumby" relationships.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Why did the apple go to the gym? It wanted to get a little churned.
What's a pizza's favorite song? "Slice, Slice, Baby."
Why don't eggs tell secrets? They'd spill the yolk.
What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.
What's a potato's favorite dance? The mash.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why did the broom go to therapy? It was always sweeping things under the rug.
What's a ghost's favorite game? Hide and shriek.
Why don't clowns ever fight? They're too busy juggling.
What did the pencil say to the paper? I've got a point to make.
Why did the clock go to jail? It was always ticking people off.
What's a vampire's least favorite food? Garlic bread.
Why don't programmers date? They're afraid of any merge conflict.
What did the blanket say to the bed? I've got you covered.
Why did the lamp go out? It was burnt out.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did Flash Thompson fail at stand-up comedy? His punchlines were too bully.
What's Spider-Man's least favorite chore? Dusting the webs.
Why did the Sandman join a beach volleyball team? He's got the best serve.
What did Peter Parker say to MJ at the dance? "Wanna swing?"
Why doesn't the Rhino use social media? He keeps charging at the screen.
What's Mysterio's favorite hobby? Smoke and mirrors magic tricks.
Why did Electro get kicked out of the band? He kept shocking the audience.
What's J. Jonah Jameson's favorite drink? Decaf—he's already loud enough.
Why did the Lizard become a motivational coach? He's great at shedding old habits.
What did Spider-Man say to the bank robber? "You're caught in my web now!"
Why did the computer go to art school? It wanted to learn to draw a better "byte."
What's a robot's favorite snack? Microchips.
Why don't smartphones date? They're too attached to their chargers.
What did the Wi-Fi say to the router? "You're my connection."
Why did the laptop go to therapy? It had too many "deep-rooted" viruses.
What's a hacker's favorite sport? Phishing.
Why don't coders trust elevators? They're afraid of getting stuck in a loop.
What did the website say to the server? "Don't crash on me now!"
Why did the AI go to school? To improve its neural network.
What's a computer's favorite dance? The algorithm.