{Clark's inner monologue}
{I've never been an angry man. Ma always told me to let things run down my back... Ma never told me that when you let enough stuff down your back, you've got a ton of shit on your back.
It's been six months since the last time I reached out to anyone from the League. After a panic attack, I gave J'onzz a call. I told him that I'd had trouble sleeping. He knew I was lying. I hadn't had trouble sleeping... The problem was that I didn't want to wake up.
Every time I closed my eyes I was back there...
With her...
"Kal..."
She was the most perfect woman I'd ever seen. Hell, I didn't even know her name. I just knew that she was so damn beautiful. We met at a party at Bruce's. She was dancing with three other women who dwarfed her in size. They created a circle around her, swaying their hips to the beat of some dance group Bruce liked. Through the dancing women, our eyes met. She wore a golden mask, but I could see her pure blue eyes...
"Dance with me..." she said as she reached out her hand to me.
One of the large women reached for her blade but the woman with the pale blue eyes stopped her. The women bowed their heads and took a few steps.
"I'm..."
She placed a finger on my lips stopping me from speaking.
"Shoo," she cooed as her eyes stared up at me. "Just dance..."}
Beep, beep...
"Get your ass up, Smallville...."
... Beep, beep...
"Get up!"
...BEEP... BEEP... BEEEEEEEE
My eyes opened as I slammed my hand down onto the alarm clock next to me. I barely noticed the crumpled metal between my fingers. As I looked over I noticed the broken clock in my hands.
"Damn it Smallville, that's the fifth clock this week," I heard Lois's voice shouting from the bathroom.
With a heavy sigh, I brushed the broken pieces of metal off my hands. I sat up in my bed and slid my legs over the edge of the bed. I let out a sigh as I heard Lois's voice shrieking through three walls. I started to rub the side of my head.
"I'll get another one," I grumbled as I rubbed my temples.
"...Nevermind him, Perry I've got the scoop..."
Ignored again...
Still groggy I stumbled my way over to the window. I felt the sun's warmth the closer I got to it. In a flash, I flung the curtains back and basked in the first light of the morning.
"Blessed be Rao," I muttered under my breath. "For bringing a new day..."
A Kryptonian prayer I heard a while back in the Fortress. J'onzz said that embracing my heritage might help with my 'attack'. They were sun worshipers, but I picked up their practices because standing in the first sunlight almost felt like...
"... Just dance..."
I closed my eyes and I saw her. A raven-haired beauty is hidden by a golden mask. Tall, thick, and... Her nails dug into my back... She felt so tight...
"Gods... Oh, gods..."
Her eyes were hooded... I reached down to touch myself...
"Come on Perry..."
Lost in thought Lois's morning rant pulled me back to reality. I heard Lois slamming her phone down onto the marble countertops of our bathroom. I looked down at myself. Hard as a rock and aching.
"... You're not doing a story on ..." I heard Perry shout over speakerphone.
"... But my source..."
"Fuck your source, Lois," Perry bellowed. "I don't want the US military nor the Amazonian embassy up my ass because of a 'reliable source'..."
The phone line went dead. Lois came bursting into the bedroom. Without turning away from the sun I sensed the rage oozing off of her.
"For fucks sake, why does everyone protect her ass!" she hissed.
I took a few deep breaths to try and calm the raging boner I had but it failed. Lois was cussing her way around our apartment. Tossing papers and clothes everywhere.
"Lois, maybe you need to let this go..." I said calmly.
Sadly, the moment the words left my mouth I regretted it.
"Damn it...." she railed. "Now you're protecting her too..."
"I'm not protecting anyone," I replied with a sigh. "It's not healthy..."
I felt her grab my arm. I let her pull me around to face her. She dug her fingers into my bare chest as she looked down at my body.
"You were thinking about her, weren't you?!" she growled.
"Lois I wasn't....
"Listen to me..." she slowed down her words to make them sting even more. "Farmboy..."
I cringed as she insulted my upbringing.
"This has nothing to do with Diana," I strained to say calmly.
"Diana, Diana, Diana!" she continued to hiss.
Lois threw her hands up in the air.
"I know you've been talking to her..."
"I haven't spoken to her in years," I said.
"Lies!"
Lois opened one of her dresser drawers and started tossing things at me.
"I know you've been fucking her...."
She was irate and I needed to get away. I wasn't about to let another drop was down my back.
"I don't have time for this," I said as I walked past her.
I stormed into the bathroom and slammed the door behind me. The door frame cracked and fractured up the side of the wall up to the ceiling.
"Smallville... OPEN THIS DAMN DOOR!" she hissed through the door. "I'm not finished with you..."
I walked into the shower and turned on the water. It didn't drown out the sound of her voice, but it gave me something else to focus on.
Drip... drip....
I let the water wash over me and I lowered my head. As the lukewarm water rushed over me I tried to put myself back into that place.