The afternoon sky on the shores of Lake Toba always has its own way of hugging a tired heart. The sunlight that begins to sink slowly creates an orange tinge on the surface of the water, as if reflecting an almost unreal sense of peace. On a wooden bench that had been eaten by the weather, Charles sat hugging a warm cup of coffee that had lost its heat.
It was a day he would never forget. Not because of the beauty of the twilight, nor because of the cool mountain air. But because of a girl named Erin who came in silence, then messed up the entire contents of her head with just one smile.
They met by accident. Erin was walking alone, carrying a camera around her neck, wearing a gray hoodie and jeans that were starting to wear out but still made her look unique. Charles, who had been sitting alone since earlier, just stared without the intention of saying hello. But Erin approached him first.
"Are you alone?" he asked lightly, in a soft, unpretentious voice.
Charles just nodded. He is not the type of person who is good at opening conversations, especially with strangers. But there was something in Erin's eyes that made it hard to turn away.
"Me too," Erin continued as she sat down at the end of the bench. "It's funny. A lonely place often brings together two people who are both lonely."
Charles glanced at her, then smiled slightly. "Or, a lonely place makes us realize that we do need to be accompanied."
Erin chuckled, then pulled the camera out of her neck and took pictures of the sky. "I love this place. His silence felt honest. Just like you."
"Just like me?"
"You don't say much, but I can feel it. you are not a random person."
I don't know where that courage came from, but Erin spoke with a warm honesty. Charles felt like he was hearing the voice he had been longing for for a long time, even though he had just met. And from that day on, Charles' life changed.
They met again at the same place a week later. Then another week. Until it becomes a long-awaited routine. Charles even started coming early, only to be able to see Erin from a distance as the girl stepped towards their bench, swinging his camera and bringing up new stories.
Erin loves to write poetry. He often reads his writings while closing his eyes, as if letting every word fly with the wind. Charles loved to listen, even though he was not a lover of literature. But in Erin's voice, every sentence became a kind of prayer that she didn't want to stop.
"I like you, Charles," Erin said two months after their first meeting. "You're calm. He didn't say much, but he was always present. I feel safe."
Charles did not answer with words. He just looked into Erin's eyes, then gently clasped his hands. Sometimes love doesn't need much explanation. It grows silently, then blooms like an unplanned wildflower.
They live their days as in the story. Occasionally fighting, often laughing, and always trying to get back to each other. But that happiness was tested when Charles had to return to Medan for a job that could not be abandoned. Erin, who is still studying at Samosir, could not participate. A long-distance relationship is the only option, even though both of them know, it's not an easy thing.
"I promise I'll come here often," Charles said as he said goodbye at the station. "We can still live this. I believe it."
Erin smiled faintly. "I also believe. But sometimes just believing is not enough."
Those were the last words that troubled Charles' mind all the way home. He tries to ignore her, replacing it with the belief that their love is strong enough to last.
For the first few months, they survived. Video calls every night, sweet messages every morning, and visits every two weeks are binding. But slowly, everything starts to change. Erin began to be difficult to reach. Sometimes the reason is the task, sometimes it is tired, sometimes it just disappears without notice.
Charles tried to understand. He knows Erin's world is busy. But his heart couldn't lie the anxiety that grew day by day.
One night, Charles wrote a long message.
"Erin, I don't know what you're feeling. But I'm still here. Still love you as before. If you're tired, I can wait. But if you want to stop, please tell me. Don't let me go on without direction."
The message was just read. Not replied.
That night, Charles returned to Lake Toba. He sat on their wooden bench, quietly accompanied by a cup of coffee that now tasted more bitter than usual. Not Erin. No laughter. Only the afternoon breeze brings a shadow of memories.
And for the first time, Charles realizes something terrifying: maybe, that beginning they once had... never to come back.
He stared at the calm lake, but his heart was like being hit by an invisible wave. He tried to remember the sound of Erin's laughter, the way the girl said her name in a soft tone, and the look in his eyes that used to be his. Now, all of that is just a shadow.
The night breeze carries the wet scent of foliage and evaporated hope. Charles was still sitting on the bench, not knowing if he was waiting for someone... or just trying to make peace with a loss that has not been officially pronounced.
In silence, he began to understand: to love sometimes means to give up, even without saying goodbye. Then finally Charles returned to the hotel and left the lake which had fond memories of him.
That morning, the air still felt cool as Charles sat on the balcony of his apartment. Before him, the bustling cityscape looked so ordinary, just like the previous days. However, there was something different in him. There was an emptiness that he couldn't explain, a feeling that had permeated slowly since Erin had left his life.
The phone on the small table next to him vibrated, a short message came to the screen. Charles stared at him for a moment, knowing who sent the message without needing to open the app. That's from Erin, a woman who fills almost every day with laughter and long conversations. But now, everything feels empty.
"Hey, Char. I think we need to talk."
Charles took a deep breath, feeling pain in his chest. It wasn't the first time Erin had sent a text message like this, but this time it felt different. Every word that was delivered was always like a needle pricking it, reminding him of a past full of hope—and ultimately, disappointment.
He opened the message and read the next sentence: "I feel like we've gone too far, Char. This relationship can no longer be maintained."
The statement was like a hammer that destroyed the reality he had been trying to build all along. The distance of thousands of kilometers, the time that stretched between them, had made everything difficult. However, what hurts the most is the fact that it is Erin who has chosen to leave.
Charles stared blankly at his phone screen. After a long time of struggling to maintain this long-distance relationship, Erin finally chose to end it all. The pain came suddenly, hitting him harder than he expected. He didn't know what to feel, between being disappointed, angry, or even relieved—because everything felt so vague.
"I still love you, Erin," she murmured, even though the voice was only heard in her heart.
Time and time again he tried to convince himself that this was the right decision. They have been too far apart, and maybe the love is not strong enough to survive in separation. However, in his heart, Charles felt like he was missing out on something great. Maybe there was something that had to be lost in order for him to move forward, but still, the sense of loss was too deep to simply ignore.
He stared out the window, noticing the hustle and bustle of the world that didn't seem to care about his problems. The world kept moving, and Charles felt as if he was in the midst of the crowd, but was trapped in solitude. He doesn't know where to start, or even how to get out of the vortex of feelings that keeps spinning.
That's when his phone vibrated again. This time, not from Erin. That was a message from his best friend, Adi.
"When are we going to have coffee, bro? I think you need time for yourself."
Charles smiled faintly, then replied to the message. He knows Adi is right, he does need time for himself. But for now, he just wanted to be alone, think about everything that happened, and perhaps, find out what would come after this.
The burden felt heavy, but Charles knew that life had to go on. Although his heart was still left in the past, he had to start thinking about his next move. For the first time, he felt that there was an empty space in his heart that could not be filled by anything.
And that's when, without realizing it, his life will meet someone who might change the course of the story—someone who will teach him that love doesn't have to come from a lost past, but it could come when we're ready to open our hearts to new things.
Charles took a deep breath. He had to accept reality. However, one thing he knew for sure – this never-returning beginning, would bring about a great change in his life