Where Auren anticipates his tragic backstory, recaps everyone else's trauma with sarcasm and flair, and single-handedly destroys the fourth wall like it owes him money.
---
[INT. THE RECAP CENTER – Auren descends a staircase that wasn't there before. In a velvet cape. For no reason.]
AUREN (grinning):
Welcome back to my show—
Where the plot thickens, secrets deepen, and I wear eyeliner for your emotional survival.
Today's episodes?
Chapters 13 to 16.
Title of the arc: "Everyone Has a Backstory But Me, and I'm About to Fix That."
---
📜 CHAPTER 13: THE CLADUS CONSPIRACY™
AUREN:
We discovered that Cladus isn't just a stoic slab of knight-shaped responsibility—
He has mystery. He has loyalty issues.
He smells letters and knows falcon sigils like a tragic poetry professor.
AUREN (mocking):
> "I don't take pride in watching girls die."
AUREN (screaming):
WHO GAVE HIM THAT LINE? THAT'S A ME LINE. I SAY THAT.
[Author Puppet peeks from curtain.]
"It's called character development."
AUREN (throws candlestick):
IT'S CALLED THEFT.
---
🥀 CHAPTER 14: THE OATH
AUREN:
He was watching Elara before I even noticed her.
This is fine.
I'm fine.
Cue montage of Auren pacing dramatically while whispering, "am I the side character??"
---
🌧️ CHAPTER 15: THE DREAM THAT BROKE US
AUREN (solemn now):
Elara remembered the night everything fell.
The lace, the rain, the perfume.
The betrayal that tasted like sugar over poison.
AUREN (quietly):
And me… smiling at court
while she shattered behind silk.
[He turns away. For a long moment, it's silent.]
Then—
AUREN (spins dramatically back around):
WHY WASN'T I EVEN IN MOST OF THE CHAPTER!?
---
🔥 BONUS: Auren's Flashback Teaser
AUREN:
But it's okay.
Because next chapter?
It's my turn.
> "The boy I used to be. The man I became. The crown I never wanted."
Yeah. That one's mine.
---
🎭 FAN COMMENT REACTS
> Fan #1: "Cladus might be the true male lead…"
AUREN: Blocked. Emotionally. Legally.
> Fan #2: "I cried during the rain scene."
AUREN: Same. But also? I looked great that night. Just saying.
> Fan #3: "Are you okay?"
AUREN: No. But I'm stylish about it.
---
🧸 AUTHOR PUPPET INTERVENTION
AUTHOR PUPPET:
"Please let other characters be sad sometimes, Auren."
AUREN:
Fine.
But only if I get the next flashback.
And a sword.
And a tragic music cue.
[Sevrin walks by. Smirking. Throws him a sword.]
AUREN (catching it):
...Perfect.
---
💌 Reader Outro
ELARA (offscreen):
Thank you for reading. We promise the next chapter will answer more questions—
AUREN (interrupting):
—about ME. You're welcome. Bring tissues and mirrors. I'll need both.
🔥✨ Meet Your Recap-Center-Exclusive Agent of Chaos:
SEVRIN D'ARLAIS™
"I'm not part of the main story. I'm just the reason Auren loses his mind every three episodes."
AUREN (raging):
"Welcome back to my recap where betrayal rains and the author doesn't love me enough to—"
[Door creaks open.]
SEVRIN (stepping in, sipping wine):
"Did someone say betrayal? Or is that just your face now, darling?"
AUREN (choking on tea):
"WHY IS HE HERE AGAIN?"
SEVRIN (sitting on armrest, smug):
"Legally, I'm just a hallucination. Emotionally? I'm your unresolved guilt in a better outfit."
---
🎨 Author's Note:
Sevrin D'Arlais is an entirely original character created for Recap Chaos Purposes™.
He is not canon. He's just hot, toxic, and legally mine.
Please don't ask when he'll enter the real story.
Auren's mental stability wouldn't survive it.
#TeamSevrin #AurenDeservedThis #RedWineRedFlags