Chapter 1: The Message
"You're selfish."
That message kept echoing in my mind. From the person I held so dear—the one I believed would never speak a harsh word to me—it hit harder than I could admit. And then, silence. Months passed with no reply. Every message I sent was marked as read, but he never responded.
Eventually, I stopped sending them. Instead, I wrote letters—ones he'd never see—and folded them neatly into a box tucked inside the drawer of my nightstand. I poured myself into those words, quietly, privately.
We had been lovers for almost five years, though we had barely met in person. He lived in a neighboring country, a foreigner by birth. Even now, I still don't fully understand how we ended up together, or how it all began.
Chapter 1 The beginning
We first connected six years earlier, through a website meant for platonic relationships. It was quieter back then, the internet still somewhat pristine. We became pen pals—though in the modern sense: emails, messages, and the occasional voice recording. I never once doubted he was genuine. Maybe it was the timing, or maybe because others I met on that site remained lifelong friends. Somehow, I trusted him.
At the time he reappeared in my life, I had been single for nearly a year. My previous boyfriend had left me cold, saying he never saw us as lovers. I accepted it and moved on. My heart was broken, yes—but a small voice inside had always whispered, "It won't last." And so, I found peace.
That's when the vision came. It unspooled in my mind like a forgotten film reel—scenes from another life, with that same ex-boyfriend. I saw the karmic thread that tied us, understood that our bond had come full circle. And I was grateful we'd resolved it in this lifetime.
Around that same time, Kaelen messaged me.
He mentioned he was single too—hadn't seen a woman in over a year. I laughed, replying, "We've never even met. We don't know each other."
He disagreed. "Who says that? We've known each other for six years. I know you."
Then came a flood of memories from him: summaries of all our conversations, pictures I'd sent him over the years, even the little details I'd forgotten. And finally, his version of my personal profile—who he believed I was, after all this time.
I was touched. Or maybe I'm just easily persuaded. Either way, I said yes.
The next morning, he messaged me: "Good morning, sayang."
I was stunned. It had begun.
I'm not a naturally warm person. People often say I'm aloof, cold, quiet. I'm an introvert at heart—someone who's learned to speak well for work, but prefers silence in private. And yet… I liked his message. It made me smile. I replied simply: "Good morning, Kaelen."
He lived just one country over, but his work took him all over the world. Still, from that day forward, whenever he traveled, he sent me his location. Even when he couldn't chat, he shared where he was—as if to say, I haven't disappeared.
Then one day, he asked, "What do you want for dinner tomorrow?"
He was flying in to see me.
He chose a restaurant near my office and his hotel. He was staying in the 5 stars hotel in CBD area—in a place that matched my quiet preferences. And even though he insisted we had known each other for years, he treated me with calm respect.
Our first few dates were like any traditional courtship—measured, polite, almost awkward. Two ordinary people getting to know each other, like cautious strangers.
But under it all, something old stirred. Something that didn't belong to this lifetime alone.
It started with a message. But it was never just a message.