Okay, how do I go about explaining this without sounding like a dick?
…Fuck it. If it comes off that way, it comes off that way.
Right. So, Norse food.
I don't know what I was expecting, to be entirely honest. Granted, considering clearly what this establishment's purpose is, I think it's safe to say I didn't have any expectations.
Even then, as I stared at the frankly absurdly large wooden bowl of steaming stew before us, I didn't know what to think.
Well, beyond the fact that I could easily stuff my entire head into the bowl and probably drown myself in the stew, but that's more an observation than anything else.
This is the first thing Rose recommended we order, and to be honest, I can't say why.
Unless she's got some sort of scheme where she plans to make us full as fast as possible in order to save money.
I could see her trying that.
It still wouldn't stop me from spending more money.
If there's one thing Kuroka taught me beyond Senjutsu, it's how to spend.
And I didn't even need to be there for any of it! I just had to look at my bank statements at the end of the month!
Anyhow! Back to the present moment!
When the stew magically appeared on the table, it also came with a big wooden spoon, which I'm tempted to say is actually a ladle considering its size, along with…is that bread?
It smells like freshly baked bread, but it looks closer to a tortilla with the thickness of a pancake.
In my lap, Rose clapped her hands together and let out a content little sigh, "Ah~, I didn't expect it to smell so good, but considering the price, it had better…"
That last bit sounded wholly like a threat, and for a second, I could have sworn I saw a vengeful glimmer in her eye.
She isn't wrong, though; it does smell pretty good!
I can't comment on the price, though. I can't read!
Heh. Blissful ignorance.
I point toward the stew. "So, you just called this 'the stew' earlier. Does it have a name, and what's even filling this up?"
My guess is something like 'The Mighty Stew' because of its size, and then fitting alongside that, a whole lot of meat.
Rose perked up, "Oh! Right, I suppose I did sort of brush over the why I recommended it, d-didn't I?" Rose cleared her throat, and waved toward the steaming broth, "The menu calls it the 'Hearty Stew,' its made from slow-cooked meat and root vegetables with a mix of earthly spices." Rose looked down and smiled slightly. "It's a pretty standard dinner dish around here, perfect for keeping you warm and full no matter how cold or empty you are."
Damn it! So close!
Still, I don't let that get me down, and I let out a low whistle before smiling alongside her, "Sounds pretty good to me, but what kinda meat are we talking about?"
"Ah, just beef," Rose answered, her smile turning a little uneasy as she looked up at me, "there were other options, like venison, and more…exotic meat options from the other realms, but I wasn't sure you'd like any of those, so, just to be safe, beef."
'Exotic?'
I don't think I've had venison before, but meat from other realms?
I'm not going to lie; that definitely piqued my curiosity! But at the same time, if Rose isn't sure…well, I'll accept her judgment on the matter.
"Still," I start slowly, "are you okay with beef? Don't you have any other preferences?"
Rose chuckled shyly at that, "W-Well, not really, no. I always preferred simpler options…" She considered what she said for a second before swiftly adding, "A-And not just because it's cheaper, either! Even when certain things suddenly got more popular for no reason at all, like that time when troll was…" Rose slowly trails off, pulled into a memory, cringing all the while.
I cringed along with her, of course.
Troll? Actual troll!? Who the hell would eat that?
I don't want an actual answer to that question.
Without a second thought, I pull Rose out of her trip down memory lane with a simple, "Well, alright then! Let's eat!"
Rose blinked out of it, and looked back at me, a big bright smile on her face as she nodded, "Mhmm!"
That said, I scooped up the totally not a ladle and dipped it in the stew, pulling out a spoonful…which I held up for Rose.
She blinked, first at the 'spoon' in my hand, then she tilted her head to blink at me.
My smile morphed into a smirk, and I wiggled the 'spoon' in my hand as I cooed, "Come on now, Rose, open up, say, ah~!"
"W-What!? But that's…" Rose flushed red, looking down at the 'spoon' in my hand with a shy, tense pout. After a moment, though, she gulped, nodded her head once, and her pout morphed into a semi-determined glare.
She opened her mouth without another word, and went, "A~Ah~...?"
A little unsure, but adorable nonetheless, heh!
I didn't shove the entire thing into her mouth; the 'spoon' was way too big for that, so instead, I carefully poured the contents in, chuckling happily once the 'spoon' was emptied, and she shut her mouth to chew.
She refused to look at me, but I could see enough from what little of her face I could catch that, although mightily embarrassed, she was very pleased.
It took her a few moments to chew. I guess the 'Hearty' in the name isn't for nothing, huh? But when she finished up, she gulped it down and let out a satisfied sigh.
"I didn't think I'd miss it so much…" Rose let out as a low murmur that I barely caught.
Nothing quite like eating food from your homeland after a long stint away, is there?
That said, Rose slowly turned back to me, her blush still burning across her face. "N-Now," she begins, not entirely certain, "it is your turn!"
Oh?
Just like that, the silver-haired girl snatched the 'spoon' from my grasp, not quicker than I could react to, but why would I ruin her fun?
And just as I did, she dipped the 'spoon' in and turned back to me with a ladleful of stew, which she promptly held up, hands a little shaky.
"U-Um…Say, ah~? P-Please~?" Rose tried; she really did.
I let out a soft chuckle, my hand coming up to take the hand Rose is using to hold up the ladle, steadying it.
"Heh. Thank you for the food~..." I hum out, before opening wide, looking her straight in the eyes, "Ah~!"
Rose stared at me, eyes wide, and even with my hand helping keep her steady, she still almost poured the contents straight onto my chin.
In the end, though, we managed, and I held an embarrassed Rose happily as I chewed, even as she covered her face and blabbered incoherently about almost messing it up.
As for the stew?
Well, it was alright.
It tasted pretty much exactly as Rose said it was made of.
It's pretty simple, all things considered.
Now, that doesn't mean bad, per se. In this case, it truly just means simple. A little basic flavor-wise.
Not bad, or even bland, just…simple.
Yeah, thats probably how I'd describe it, even at the risk of it sounding dickish in a way.
To be honest, I get far more enjoyment feeding Rose and watching her reactions than eating this myself.
I do not want to be that guy, but I think Japanese food has spoiled my taste buds a bit too much.
In any event, after Rose calmed down enough so that we could continue eating, well, we did exactly that.
That thing I called a mix of a tortilla and a pancake earlier? Turns out that was just flatbread.
Who could have seen that coming?
I ended up making something like a meat taco out of the meat from the stew, folded between a slice of the flatbread.
"..." Rose stared at me, her eye twitching, as I held my impromptu Norse taco up like a creation hot off my forge, with all the pride that comes with it.
I couldn't tell if she wanted to strangle me or not for screwing with such a traditional meal.
Even if she admitted that the said 'Norse taco' didn't taste bad at all.
Apparently, the proper way to do it is to tear off pieces of the bread and dip it in the stew. Soak up the juices and all that.
I think I prefer my Norse taco, though, purely because I get to call it a Norse taco, and that sounds funny to me.
Around halfway through the stew, I pretty much forced her to set it aside for the time being.
It turns out she was planning to try and fill us up on just the stew.
Sneaky girl.
Unfortunately for her, I was determined to spend money on her, and for this!
And thus, incomes a bit of a food montage.
After a bit of cajoling, I managed to convince Rose to move on and pick up our next dish, something called gravlax.
It was a cured salmon, mixed with herbs and spices, of course, on rye bread.
Definitely a different taste compared to something like say, sushi. Also it came with another bread type I hadn't seen or ever had before, neat.
Unfortunately, I couldn't make a Norse taco 2.0 with the fish and the bread, even though I was fairly tempted to try.
". . ." All those desires were dashed fairly quickly when a certain silver-haired girl glared me down, though.
Next up, as a result of me asking for something a little sweeter, she ordered the salted caramel apples.
Confused the hell out of me for a straight minute. I'm no food history buff, but I'm fairly certain caramel apples didn't come from the Vikings. Or just Northern Europe in general.
Then again, I guess not everything on the menu has to be from around here. I just sort of assumed…
I suppose that's on me. Woops!
Anyhow, can't go wrong with caramel apples. They even came in wedges, and the caramel was used as a dipping sauce instead of just being on the apples already, which was nice.
That done, Rose practically begged that we order this next thing, apparently it's one of the cheaper things on the menu, so I decided, why not?
Not like we aren't going to order more stuff after.
Especially since it just turned out to be honey-glazed root vegetables.
Again, not entirely sure if covering a bunch of carrots and turnips and the like in honey, salt, and spices and then cooking it is a northern dish, but eh, they weren't bad. I do like honey.
Speaking of honey, though, that led Rose to recommend something a little more unique for dessert.
Something called skyr; she pretty much likened it to yogurt.
You could get all sorts of toppings and such with it, too. I ended up getting berries and honey on mine.
"Oh muh~ me~...Mmm~..." I moaned as I shoved an actual proper spoonful of the stuff in my mouth.
Rose, still in my lap, giggled airily at my reaction, "It sounds like you like it?"
"Ohhh~ yeah…"
Oh, hell yeah, I did! It's rich, creamy, and smooth, and the honey and berries give its mild sort of tangy flavor a far sweeter and fruity pop.
Honestly, probably the best thing I've had here!
Rose cupped her small bowl of plain skyr in her hands, the properly sized spoon sitting in it, undisturbed for now.
Our table is mostly cleared up by now, save the menu and notepad near the table ends; every single time we're finished with something, it gets teleported away.
Seriously, I can't even begin to undersell how cool a magic restaurant is.
Rose, though, didn't seem so enthused; instead, all of a sudden, she was staring off toward the menu, cringing slightly.
I have a feeling I know what's on her mind, but just to be sure…
I remove my spoon from my mouth with a sigh and eye her up seriously, "Hey…you okay? Was there something wrong with the food I didn't notice?"
Rose flinched, and looked back toward me, looking almost ashamed or guilty, "Oh, n-no! Nothing like that, everything was made up to my standards, and even surpassed them in some cases! It's just…" Her eyes drifted toward the menu again, anguish clear in her pretty blue eyes this time.
"The prices, huh," I say slowly.
As slowly as I spoke, Rose nodded her head before catching herself and freezing, quickly following up with, "W-Well, yes! I just don't think-"
"I think it is worth it." I interrupted her with an easy shrug.
Rose stared at me, absolutely flabbergasted, her mouth shutting, then opening, and then shutting again.
Eventually, she let out a huff. "It's r-rude, interrupting a lady like that all the time."
I smirk, "It's required, when said lady starts freaking out about stuff she doesn't need to worry about."
"...T-The prices though…!" Rose starts wriggling in my lap, as though somehow the numbers on that piece of paper are going to commit a crime of some sort, and she has to stop it.
As if I care about the price tag. I can't even read it!
But more importantly.
I shook my head, taking away her skyr and setting it down with mine on the table before I took her hands in mine.
Before she could even say anything else, I looked her straight in the eyes.
"I told you this before, didn't I? Before we even started ordering." I recall with an easygoing smile, "I told you it's worth it. Do you know why?"
Rose shimmied back and forth in my lap, barely able to meet my gaze as she responded, "Your…promise?"
I considered that for a moment before shaking my head, causing Rose to widen her eyes my way, before I elaborated, "Technically, my promise is only part of it. You wanna know the full reason?"
For a split second, Rose's gaze sharpened, and she nodded.
I smirked.
"It's because you're worth it."
Rose promptly froze, stock still as I uttered those words, straight to her face.
"I know we haven't known each other the longest," I continue, unabated, unabashed, "but I can say for certain…you're worth it. There's no price tag too high, no length too long, nothing. Every guy here? They're blind that they didn't see it before I did."
"T-That…" Rose stuttered, "That's not true, I'm not…I couldn't even…"
"Disregard what other people expect of you." I continue, blasting through her doubts, "Consider what you've done. Look at all you've done, think of that. Compare it to everyone else, and what do you find?"
"I-I…I don't know, Nori. I don't know," she uttered weakly, "all my life, starting from the very beginning, with my family…I failed them. I couldn't use my family's magic. During school, I couldn't even find a boyfriend. As a Valkyrie, I couldn't find souls to bring in as heroes, and as Odin's bodyguard…well…" she chuckles dryly, "that didn't last all that long, did it?"
"And yet…?" I eased her on with a raise of my eyebrow, "You didn't make it to your position as Odin's bodyguard just on a whim, did you?"
"No…I suppose I didn't," she said. "I couldn't inherit my family's magic, so I went into the combat magic used by the Valkyrie instead. I ran through school, and even college skipped so many grades, graduated so early, became a Valkyrie…" She lets out a small sad smile, "sometimes I wonder if any of it was worth it, considering how it all ended up…"
I let out a considerate hum before smiling back at her, "Hmm…I'm gonna be selfish for a moment and say that, considering you ended up with me?" I settle my forehead against her and wrap an arm around her waist, holding her close. "Yeah. Yeah, I think it was."
Like that, Rose stares at me, completely and utterly flabbergasted.
Then, slowly, ever so slowly, she reaches up and wraps her arms around my shoulders, tears pricking the corners of her eyes as her face starts rapidly heating up.
"Y-Yeah…" She murmured back to me in bashful agreement, "Maybe, it was~..."
All of a sudden, she leans forward.
She didn't have to move much, only maybe a few inches at most, and she didn't even move that fast.
Regardless, for once, Rose still caught me completely off guard.
"Chu~..."
Rose leans in and kisses me on the lips.
Her eyes squeezed shut, she gave me probably the most chaste kiss I've ever had in any lifetime.
One delivered in the heat of the moment, without any planning or knowing how to kiss.
That's okay, though.
Because I know just how to respond.
I wrap my other arm around her, letting her hands go to hold her entirely within my arms. I kept her close, even as she tried to naturally pull away.
Poor girl has no idea what she's doing, and frankly, I'm no master class kisser, but I don't exactly need to be either.
As soon as she tried, my lips immediately caught back up to hers and claimed them back, properly.
Rose's little kiss was gentle, tentative, sweet, and not sloppy by any means, but it could barely be called a kiss.
As soon as my lips crash into hers, Rose lets out a squeak before tapering off into a muffled, pleased moan.
And just like that, she sits there. I hold her, my fingers digging into the softness of her dress, while her hands trail up from my shoulders to my head, messing with my hair for reasons she probably doesn't know.
In my grasp, I can feel Rose as a shiver goes down her spine, our bodies locked in the kiss as we are; that's the only movement I feel.
I don't count the moments, the seconds, as it goes on, until eventually Rose tilts her head to the side and lets out a shuddering breath for air, clearly for air.
Yet still, I'm hungry now. Ross gave me a taste of something else, and I want more.
So I follow her lips like a bloodhound on the hunt and kiss her again, drawing a shocked but no less pleased groan from the silver-haired girl in my arms.
She gave me her first; I took her second.
Then her third, fourth, fifth…until eventually, I stopped caring to count.
For the next who knows how long, the only sounds that echoed in our area were satisfying sighs, low wet squishes, and airy, almost lewd moans.
My hands were halfway under her sundress when another new noise entered the room.
The sounds of fabric, moving.
"Oh."
And a…new voice!?
Almost at the same time, my and Rose's eyes flew open, for a split second taking in each other's slightly ragged appearance, before turning back toward where the curtain should be blocking anyone from seeing or even hearing us.
Only to find said curtain peeled back every so slightly, revealing the face of a slightly younger girl, maybe a few years younger, peering in on us.
The girl looked…fairly similar to Rose. With the same silvery hair and blue eyes. If I knew she didn't have any siblings, I'd hazard a guess and say this is her younger sister or something.
What really caught my eye, though? The fact that our little voyeur here was eyeing Rose specifically.
Not in a perverted manner, and she didn't seem shocked; no, rather, she seemed in awe.
"...It's you…!" The younger silver-haired girl started, "It really is you…!"
"I-I! U-Um! Idon'tknowwhatyou'retalkingabout!" Rose cried, quickly tried to scramble out of my grasp, reaching wildly for the sunhat she brought with her, which was placed at the end of the bench beside us.
She didn't even manage to reach over to it halfway.
Instead, while trying to twist around, she fell out of my lap, between my legs, and slammed her head on the table on her way down.
"A-Agh…" Rose now lay out on the floor, groaning and gurgling in mild pain and embarrassment.
Chapter 88 End
I let out a long, low breath from my nose, my divine powers positively boiling beneath my skin as I leveled a glare straight toward the girl.
Maybe it was the fact that my powers were starting to leak, or maybe my normal glare is just that scary.
Be that as it may, I watched as the smaller silvery-haired girl seized up and started breaking out in a cold sweat, her gaze now focused solely on me.
Now that I have her attention?
Seven words, spoken with an impatient hiss.
"What the fuck are you doing here?"
It better be important, or else this girl is going to have a very impromptu trip to Asgard's sun in her very near future!