Chapter 27: "Smiling Hurts Today"
The morning light came too fast.
Zariah opened her eyes, but her body felt heavy, like she was trapped beneath layers of invisible stone. Her mouth was dry, her head ached, and her stomach twisted from not eating. For a second, she didn't know where she was—then she saw Jasmine, still asleep, curled up on the floor next to her.
The memories of last night hit like a punch.
The blade. The window. The silence.
The near end.
She didn't cry. She didn't have tears left. Only a dull, aching numbness that had carved itself deep into her chest.
School.
She still had to go to school.
Because somehow, even after you almost end your life, the world expects you to sit in a classroom and answer math questions like nothing happened.
Zariah moved quietly. Got dressed in slow, robotic movements. Jasmine stirred awake when she heard the drawer close.
"You sure you want to go?" she asked, rubbing her eyes.
"No," Zariah said honestly.
Jasmine nodded. "Then why are you?"
Zariah shrugged. "Because if I stay home, I'll think too much. And I don't want to be alone with my brain today."
They didn't talk much after that. They walked to school together in silence, shoulders brushing, the air cold and sharp. Jasmine kept glancing at Zariah like she was afraid she might shatter.
In class, everything was too bright. Too loud. The teacher's voice felt like it was echoing inside her skull. People laughed. Pencils scratched. Chairs scraped.
Zariah smiled when people looked her way.
It hurt.
At lunch, she picked at her food until Jasmine finally took the tray and threw it away. "You're scaring me," she whispered. "You're here, but you're not really here."
Zariah looked down. "I don't know how to come back."
And Jasmine had no answer to that.
In the hallway between classes, someone bumped into Zariah and apologized, and she flinched so hard her books nearly fell. She wanted to scream. To run. But she didn't. She just swallowed it. Like always.
Later, when a teacher praised her for her essay, Zariah smiled again. Perfect grades. Perfect silence.
No one noticed her hands shaking.
No one noticed the way she couldn't meet her own reflection in the bathroom mirror.
No one noticed anything.
Except Jasmine.
Who never left her side.
But even love feels powerless when you're watching someone fade in slow motion.