[the constellation 'demon-like judge of fire' is hoping that the incarnation 'kim dokja' will be okay.]
He hoped so too, even though he didn't have much faith that he would. Song Minwoo had tormented him for years, and that ate away at him until he felt like a shell of a person. If he hadn't had TWSA…
Well, Kim Dokja knew exactly where he would be right now instead of here.
"Oi, Kim Dokja. What are you up to?" teenage Minwoo's overly familiar voice asks mockingly before he grabs Dokja by his shirt and yanks him up from his seat. Dokja has a large bruise on his cheek and blood dripping from a cut on his lip, and he looks absolutely terrified. Minwoo tauntingly tells him to quit reading and to buy some snacks for him and his lackeys.
Back in the present, Minwoo grasps Dokja's shirt in a similar way, and in an odd twist of fate, the suit Dokja is wearing almost resembles the school uniform. The werewolf punches Dokja in the stomach with a fist about as wide as the smaller man's waist, and Dokja coughs up some blood from the force of the impact.
Lee Jihye clenched her fists in anger as she glared intently at the screen. "Ahjussi… you'd better snap out of it and kick his ass."
Kim Dokja could tell that she was on the verge of snapping, wishing she could jump into the screen and do it herself. Honestly, it was obvious that Jung Heewon was in the same boat, and even Lee Hyunsung had abandoned his kind smile in favour of looking upset and overprotective. Something about that warmed his heart, no matter how foreign of a feeling it was.
[several constellations are feeling great hostility towards the incarnation 'song minwoo'.]
As though to comfort him, Shin Yoosung and Lee Gilyoung wrapped their arms around him. Kim Dokja hugged them back to the best of his ability, and did what he could to control his breathing the way he had learned long ago. He'd be okay. If he just kept telling himself that, then it would have to be true, right?
"Fuck," Jung Heewon hissed, biting into her lip maybe a bit too hard before she shot a glare at Han Sooyoung. "Why the fuck aren't you helping him?"
"I don't fucking know," Han Sooyoung retorted, but Kim Dokja could hear the slight notes of worry in her voice. "Maybe he already got me."
Yoo Sangah kept sending Kim Dokja worried glances, and though he knew she meant well, it was attention he didn't want or need. This was difficult enough to get through as it was without people staring at him.
He asks if they were the ones who destroyed his coin farm as Sooyoung kneels on the ground, coughing heavily. Behind her, some of her avatars have been torn apart and lay in pieces on the ground. Minwoo tries to intimidate them using [Predation], but Sooyoung's [Mental Barrier] offsets some effects as she yells at Dokja to take action and to kill him now. As she yells, confused by Dokja's sudden passivity, blood drips from her mouth and nose. However, Dokja is silent and paralyzed by his fear.
Dokja, feeling the effects of [Predation], finally assesses that this is indeed the same Minwoo from high school and is confused that the man is classified as a renouncer since he never liked reading in the first place. Minwoo brings Dokja closer to his face as he tries to analyze his scent, deeming Dokja familiar.
A scene of Minwoo taking Dokja's phone and making fun of TWSA—the one and only chapter he's ever seen—is shown on the screen before recognition dawns on the werewolf's face. As Minwoo taunts Dokja once more, calling it surprising that a novel-reading loser like him survived this long, Dokja tries to release himself from the inhuman grip. Dokja fails to understand why he's having such a hard time with Minwoo's power after dealing with the dragon previously.
Minwoo happily reintroduces himself as Dokja's 'high school buddy', and states that he was looking around to see if Dokja was still alive. While he's doing this, Sooyoung takes the chance to get to a wall for support.
"Shit," Han Sooyoung swore. "He really did fuck me up too."
This wasn't a good situation. Both of them were basically out of the fight for different reasons, and there wasn't much they could do to escape.
"Fight back, ahjussi…" Yoo Mia pleaded, her lip wobbling as she did. She was actually worried for him?
Still, pushing past years' worth of fear and trauma wouldn't be an easy feat. It wasn't easy sitting and witnessing it either. If his future self was lucky, then [The Fourth Wall] should kick in any moment, and then he'd be fine…
He was not fine. As soon as the flashback began, Kim Dokja froze up again and he resorted to mumbling over and over that this wasn't real just to keep himself present and able to respond to what was happening on the screen.
[the constellation 'prisoner of the golden headband' is not amused.]
"I was right," Kim Dokja murmured, still wading through a mixture of shock and dissociation. "He really saw it when he stole my phone."
[the constellation 'lily blooming in aquarius' is reminding the incarnations that stealing is bad.]
The odd message almost made Kim Dokja laugh, especially considering that theft had been encouraged in previous scenarios.
Yoo Joonghyuk's eyes narrowed dangerously. "He's looking for you."
Right. This hadn't happened yet, which meant that Song Minwoo was currently out there, and apparently looking for him. Fuck. Kim Dokja shuddered involuntarily, recalling exactly what would happen in high school whenever the other teenager came looking for him. Beatings, humiliation, getting shoved into closets and locked in… there were no lows that Song Minwoo hadn't stooped to. It hadn't been anything new at the time—and Kim Dokja had known how to endure pain far too well—but he was out of practice now.
"Seems like it," Kim Dokja muttered, trying to sound okay.
The protagonist's gaze flickered over to him, resting on his slightly trembling form. Clearly, he wasn't doing a good job of faking.
[the constellation 'secretive plotter' believes that the incarnation 'kim dokja' should not travel alone in the future.]
He'd be alright. He had Jung Heewon, Yoo Sangah, and Lee Hyunsung, and even the him on the screen had Han Sooyoung as backup, so—
"Kim Dokja will be coming with me."
What?
[the constellation 'demon-like judge of fire' is shrieking in excitement.]
Kim Dokja's head whipped around to stare at Yoo Joonghyuk in confusion and in shock. "Joonghyuk-ah? Why—"
"Clearly, she can't protect you," Yoo Joonghyuk stated with a quick and unimpressed glance over at Han Sooyoung. For a second, she looked almost offended, but she rolled her eyes and muttered something that Kim Dokja couldn't quite make out.
Huh??? Why the heck would the protagonist ever say something like that!?
Jung Heewon glared at him. "Hey, don't count us out either."
"We'll do our best, Joonghyuk-ssi," Lee Hyunsung told him adamantly as Yoo Sangah and the kids looked equally motivated.
Wait, no, that wasn't the point here! He didn't need constant protection!
"No," Yoo Joonghyuk said firmly, and the glare he shot at everyone declared that there would be no further arguments.
Did Kim Dokja not get a say in this? Hello?
[the constellation 'secretive plotter' is frowning at the incarnation 'yoo joonghyuk'.]
[the constellation 'demon-like judge of fire' is telling the incarnation 'kim dokja' to trust in his companion.]
He did, it was just… Kim Dokja couldn't understand why Yoo Joonghyuk would ever do something like that. And for him of all people? Just what was going on inside his head?
'I need to snap out of it. I still have [The Fourth Wall],' Dokja thinks, but instead of helping him, [The Fourth Wall] is shaking. Dokja's eyes widen as fear clouds them.
Ah… I see how it is.
A scene of Minwoo bullying Dokja flashes across the screen as Dokja finally understands how this works, recalling that it didn't work properly when [First Person Main Character POV] activated either.
It's not that this guy is strong… The problem is with me. Fuck, so that's it. Now I've realized what [The Fourth Wall] does.
Minwoo's face looks akin to a demon's as he goes to punch Dokja again. "You know that thing you used to read? Where can I read the rest of it?"
[The Fourth Wall] shakes and Dokja flinches as the hit approaches his face, his pupils mere pinpricks in his eyes from the fear.
"It's not working!?" Shin Yoosung exclaimed, half panicked as she looked up at Kim Dokja anxiously.
Damn it. Was it really…?
Lee Gilyoung was practically snarling when the next scene of Kim Dokja getting bullied appeared on the screen. "Hyung, I don't know if flesh-eating insects exist in Korea, but I will find some and I will send them after him."
Okay wait— what the fuck? Where in the actual hell did that come from?
"Gilyoung-ah!?" Kim Dokja exclaimed in shock. "What!?"
The boy looked up at him before grinning way too innocently. "I'm gonna get bugs to eat him alive, okay? The sooty bastard won't have to protect you if that bad guy is dead, and then you can stay with us forever!"
[the constellation 'abyssal black flame dragon' is intrigued by the words of the incarnation 'lee gilyoung'.]
Okay that was extremely concerning.
Han Sooyoung paled and shot anxious glances at Lee Gilyoung, probably caught somewhere between relief and fear since he hadn't exactly stated if he wanted to send anything after her. Honestly, it was a very valid concern, apparently.
Yoo Mia clicked her tongue, apparently completely unconcerned by Lee Gilyoung's homicidal tendencies that Kim Dokja really should have seen coming. "And now he wants to read the novel? Too bad, he can't see it even if he did make you give it to him."
Not that Kim Dokja would, either.
Still, he couldn't help but flinch alongside his other self when he saw yet another punch aimed at his face. In an instant, far too many of them seemed to overlap in his memories, regardless of who threw it. In the end, a punch was a punch, and Kim Dokja had been the designated target for too long to be unaffected.
[the constellation 'queen of the darkest spring' is hoping that the incarnation 'kim dokja' will not be too hurt.]
[The Fourth Wall]. An Exclusive Skill that I had from the very beginning. I still don't know the full extent of this skill's effects, but one thing is for certain.
The force of the punch sends Dokja rocketing into a wall as Sooyoung moves to go after him. Upon impact, the whites of Dokja's eyes are shown as he spits out blood.
This skill…makes me see this world as a work of 'fiction'.
Dokja opens his eyes, looking at the sky. He seems slightly out of it as he names the type of clouds and wonders if it's going to rain.
'I sensed that some things felt different at times,' Dokja thinks as he slides down the wall, leaving a bloodstain behind. 'Unlike the real world, I was able to make quick decisions, as if I were looking at myself from an outsider's perspective.'
All of that was because I had [The Fourth Wall].
Dokja lets his head fall as he slumps to the ground, blood continuing to pour from the wound on his head and from his mouth. He's brought out of his stupor when Sooyoung swears at him and asks what he's up to, upset that this is happening right after he told her to trust him. She says all this while angrily standing in front of him and sending waves of avatars to fight Minwoo.
"So that's what it really does?" Han Sooyoung muttered, wincing as she watched Kim Dokja slam into a brick wall.
Kim Dokja nodded after swallowing down his anxiety. "Seems like it."
[the constellation 'scribe of heaven' is narrowing his eyes at the incarnation 'kim dokja'.]
Lee Seolhwa frowned. "Dokja-ssi, pardon me for asking since I'm sure you've already considered it, but is that normally how you experience dissociation?"
Kim Dokja's eyes went distant. Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't want to answer, but it wasn't like he got any privacy at this point anyway—plus, she was a doctor. "It depends, honestly. Sometimes I feel completely disconnected from my body, like I'm watching myself from somewhere else in the room, and sometimes I shut down completely."
He could feel several gazes on him, but Kim Dokja took a deep breath and forced himself to not look back at them. "I thought that my skill might just be an extreme form of dissociation at first, to be honest, but that still wouldn't make me immune to other things."
"I see," Lee Seolhwa muttered. "Still, while I know it can't be easy—especially in the middle of the apocalypse—I hope that you'll be able to find ways to get it under control."
Lee Seolhwa was so nice; no wonder Yoo Joonghyuk fell in love with her. She was kind and gentle, caring and smart. There was no one else who could keep up with the protagonist, and no one else who could offer him the comfort he desperately needed. Still, that didn't mean she was helpless—after all, when she was the Poison Beauty, then she would be an extremely dangerous foe. Kim Dokja had hated having to read through those rounds, seeing Yoo Joonghyuk's distress at having to kill his ex-wife that gradually vanished over tens and hundreds of regressions as he closed off his emotions.
[a few constellations are concerned for the well-being of the incarnation 'kim dokja'.]
At the very least, Han Sooyoung was trying to help. That should gain her a few points with the rest of the group.
The Fourth Wall.
An old English theater is shown in black and white, filled by a crowd made up of Victorian nobles.
In the context of a performance, it is an imaginary wall that exists between the stage and audience, and neither the actors nor the audience can interfere with each other due to the wall separating them.
Dokja stands up, now understanding that [The Fourth Wall] shook because he couldn't help but see Minwoo as his reality and not 'fiction'.
Minwoo crushes an avatar in his hands before turning to face the next ones attacking from above. Dokja walks towards Sooyoung, claiming that this was an awakening stage and passing it off as a rough patch to make the fight more interesting. His laid back attitude not only eases Sooyoung enough to make a witty comeback, but also relieves many of the constellations.
[the constellation 'secretive plotter' is encouraging the incarnation 'kim dokja' to persevere.]
Though it would be difficult to face his own very real trauma like this, at least he knew that someone was on his side.
"Shit, he's tearing through my avatars like they're nothing," Han Sooyoung cursed. "You'd better get your ass back in the fight soon."
Kim Dokja would do his best, and at the very least, he seemed to have come to some kind of conclusion.
"I want to get in there and help so bad," Lee Jihye whined dramatically. "I have to come to ahjussi's rescue at least once!"
But why though?
[the constellation 'demon-like judge of fire' is praying for the incarnation 'yoo joonghyuk' to make an appearance.]
Yeah, that was unlikely. Who even knew where the protagonist had ended up?
Sooyoung apologizes for overhearing that Minwoo was someone from Dokja's past, but he tries to pass it off as 'normal trauma'.
"All trauma is serious," Sooyoung states with a mix of worry and confusion before trying to sound like someone wise and stating she'll graciously help him, wondering if he'll unlock more power after pulling himself together and giving a nice speech. Dokja flatly replies that he's not Hyunsung.
Dokja touches his stomach, realizing that it hurts more without [The Fourth Wall] to offset the pain. Dokja then raises his shaky gaze to Minwoo.
'Look closely, Kim Dokja. That creature isn't human,' Dokja thinks as he tries to rationalize his way out of this. Ahead of him, Minwoo's eyes glow red and he grins as he laughs, set against a background of crimson flames as he crushes another avatar. 'The bully Song Minwoo who made me miserable is long gone. It's just a monster from an inhuman species.'
The screen focuses back on Dokja who's still gritting his teeth as he looks forward, eyes slightly unfocused. Behind him, an image of a younger Dokja holding a phone closely while gazing upon its screen with dead eyes appears, as though he's trying to leave this part of him in the past. 'I'm now 28 years old, not a 17-year-old panicking because of their bully.'
"'Normal trauma', my ass," Jung Heewon scoffed. "Why do you keep downplaying stuff?"
Kim Dokja tried to laugh it off with a shrug. "Habit?"
Yoo Sangah frowned at him, narrowing her eyes. She looked extremely unimpressed, and goddammit that was probably the wrong thing to say. "Dokja-ssi, you shouldn't just accept getting hurt like that."
Logically, Kim Dokja knew that. Still, in practice, it had been the only way he had been able to survive for years. If he had tried to fight back, things would have gotten even worse.
"I know," he replied absently, and thankfully she didn't push further.
[the constellation 'master of steel' says that it's good that his incarnation is easy to motivate.]
"Ah…" Lee Hyunsung laughed awkwardly, "is it really that easy?"
Considering that he had perked up when reminded of pine trees alone earlier? Absolutely.
"Get him, ahjussi!" Shin Yoosung cheered. "Bullies never win!"
That just objectively wasn't true, but he didn't want to rain on her parade either, so he just patted her head affectionately.
[the constellation 'prisoner of the golden headband' is tearing out his hair in anticipation.]
Dokja clenches his fist as he tells himself that he can't let [The Fourth Wall] waver whenever he has to deal with something relating to his past. A Bounty Scenario appears before Dokja, brought on by many constellations hoping for him to beat his trauma.
He pats Sooyoung's shoulder, telling her to step back as he walks forward. He invests coins into Strength and Agility before drawing
Dokja takes a deep breath after [The Fourth Wall] reactivates, calming himself even as it continues to shake. The moment he opens his eyes, he rushes forwards, leaving a gash on Minwoo's collarbone. His speed surprises the werewolf, causing him to look concerned, but his new form just makes his expression look goofy. Suddenly worried, Minwoo leaps backwards to put some distance between them.
Dokja invests more coins into agility, raising it to level 50, and steels his resolve as he launches himself forwards once more. This time, he manages to slice Minwoo's arm off in a brilliant and precise slash of his sword.
[several constellations are excited to see a thrilling scene of self-improvement.]
That many constellations were really invested in him? Enough to want him to overcome this?
It felt weird. Kim Dokja had never had that many people—or anyone, really—rooting for him before. In those days, they had chosen to ignore him or look away, not wanting to get involved, or they had joined in on the teasing.
"Go hyung!" Lee Gilyoung yelled as Kim Dokja charged forward to slash at the werewolf.
Lee Jihye cheered too, "Kick his ass, ahjussi!"
Han Sooyoung flinched with every avatar that died, but she sent him a stern look anyway, as though telling him to get his head in the game here too. Fine, he'd try.
[the constellation 'secretive plotter' is nodding approvingly at the incarnation 'kim dokja'.]
"Your form is better this time," Yoo Joonghyuk said suddenly, locking eyes with Kim Dokja. "But it can still be improved."
Of course he'd find fault with it somewhere. Still, it was nice to have some normality despite everything, and Kim Dokja couldn't help but grin in return.
"You'll help me with that, right Joonghyuk-ah?"
Instead of answering verbally, Yoo Joonghyuk hummed in a way that Kim Dokja would assume meant that he agreed.
[the constellation 'demon-like judge of fire' is losing her mind because of the smile of the incarnation 'kim dokja'.]
[the constellation 'secretive plotter' is smiling gently at the incarnation 'kim dokja'.]
Distracted by the messages, Kim Dokja completely missed the intense way Yoo Joonghyuk stared at his face, and how his gaze dropped down to his lips for a few moments too long to be simple curiosity, before turning away with reddened ears. What he did not miss, however, was Han Sooyoung's exasperated groan and disdainful glare in his general direction.
"Oh, for fuck's sake! Will you cut that out?"
What was her problem anyway? He hadn't even done anything this time!