In a cramped apartment in Tokyo, 03:27.
The glow of the monitor cast flickering shadows across Yamete Kimochi's face, his bloodshot eyes locked onto the pixelated health bar of the final boss in Dragon Crusher: Legacy of the Lazy Devs.
BOSS HP: 1%
His fingers mashed the keyboard like a deranged pianist.
"DIE! JUST DIE, YOU GLITCHY PIECE OF—"
SLAM!
His fist crashed onto the desk, rattling an empty cola can and a half-eaten cup of instant ramen. The boss's sword—clearly clipping through the terrain—landed the killing blow.
"GAME OVER."
Yamete stared at the screen, his soul draining out through his nostrils. Twenty attempts. Twenty. This wasn't difficulty—this was malicious game design.
With a groan, Yamete dragged his mouse to a folder labeled "Totally Legal Stuff" and double-clicked CheatEngine.exe.
"Screw it. If the game's gonna cheat, so will I."
A few sloppy clicks later:
Infinite HP: ON
One-Hit Kill: ON
Stamina: 9999
He reloaded the boss fight.
5 seconds later:
The boss's model spasmed violently, its textures stretching into a grotesque noodle before evaporating. A victory fanfare played—but it was distorted, like a corrupted MP3 file.
Then, a pop-up appeared:
CONGRATULATIONS, CHEATER! You've been selected for a special reward:
> ENTER THE GAME WORLD? (Y/N)
Yamete snorted. "What kinda scam is this?" He jabbed 'Y'.
The screen flashed "ERROR #420: ADMIN_PRIVILEGES_GRANTED—" and everything went black.
....
.....
...
Yamete's eyelids fluttered open to a sky tiled with low-res clouds. The ground beneath him wasn't grass—it was a repeating texture of slightly off-green pixels.
Yamate wakes up and looks around. Suddenly a fountain appears behind Yamete and so does their brick road randomly appearing like a game asset that is loading.
"Uh… what?"
He tried to sit up, but his arm phased through the ground for a second before snapping back into place.
"Welcome to Dragon Crusher, Yamete-sama~!"
A high-pitched, staticky voice echoed inside his skull. Yamete whipped his head around—no one there.
"Down here, idiot. I'm your GLich-chan! Your guide, your quest log, and—oh god, why are your graphics settings so low?"
A tiny, glitching fairy materialized in front of him, her wings flickering like a buffering video.
GLich-chan twirled, sending corrupted particle effects everywhere.
"Okay, let's start with the basics! You've got your Cheat Engine skills, but—"
A notification blared:
[WARNING]
Cheat Functions: Limited by Server Stability
- Freeze Value (HP/MP): 3-second duration (Cooldown: 10 min)
- Item Dupe: 50% chance of item becoming "???"
- Speed Hack: May cause terrain to unload. Use at own risk.
Yamete's eye twitched. "This is the worst cheat ever."
"Correction!" GLich-chan grinned. "It's the only cheat ever. Now, your first quest!"
A quest log materialized:
MAIN QUEST #1: "Fix the Damn Tutorial NPC"
- Objective: Find the frozen NPC and reset his dialogue.
- Reward: 10 Gold (Non-refundable. Probably fake.)
Yamete looked across the square. A knight in full armor stood T-posed, his face locked in a permanent scream.
"...I hate this already."
....
.....
...
As Yamete trudged toward the NPC, his foot caught on a missing collision mesh, sending him plummeting waist-deep into the earth.
"Error! Error!" GLich-chan buzzed around his head. "Quick, open the console and type 'unstuck'!"
"THERE'S A CONSOLE?!"
"Oops, forgot to mention~"
After 10 minutes of flailing, Yamete finally reached the NPC and poked him.
The knight's voice boomed at 1000% volume:
"WELCOME, TRAVELER! PLEASE BRING ME 10 WOLF FANGS—"
Yamete punched him.
The NPC's model spasmed, then reset.
QUEST COMPLETE! Reward received: 10 Gold (Actually just yellow pixels).