At noon in Hogwarts' Great Hall, the young witches and wizards fresh from their first-ever lessons chatted excitedly over lunch, eagerly sharing their new experiences.
Yet, as the saying goes, one man's feast is another man's famine.
Our dear protagonist Ethan was currently slumped lifelessly on the long bench, staring blankly and without appetite at the mouthwatering platter of food before him.
"What's wrong with him?" Hermione asked, puzzled, as she watched Ethan, who seemed to have lost all color and turned completely grey.
"He was kept back by Professor McGonagall for extra lessons and was given additional homework," Harry explained to Hermione, rubbing his still soot-stained glasses with a napkin.
"He has to catch up on all Transfiguration theory from first year through fourth year at once," Ron added indistinctly, gnawing on a chicken drumstick.
Next to them, Fred started counting on his fingers, "Basic Transfiguration, Switching Spells, Animagus theory, Conjuration, Cross-Species Transfiguration—two feet of parchment per essay… Merlin's beard, it'd take me days just to skim through it all."
"That's what they call 'with great power comes great responsibility,'" George chimed in, high-fiving Fred enthusiastically.
"Oh, how wonderful!" Hermione's eyes lit up eagerly, practically glowing with thirst for knowledge.
Harry/Ron/Fred/George: ???
"This isn't good," Neville gently nudged Ethan with his elbow, concerned. "Come on, Ethan, eat a little something. My gran always says bread is the staff of life. Starving yourself won't help anything."
"Huh? Oh… right…" Ethan began moving mechanically, dipping fries into tartar sauce and chewing them robotically.
"Sigh…" Everyone else around him shook their heads helplessly, watching as Ethan continued eating with a vacant, soulless expression.
Poor soul.
Under the restorative powers of fries and tartar sauce, Ethan gradually regained some of the sparkle in his eyes. He seemed to make a firm resolution, quickly finishing off everything on his plate.
"I'm heading back to the dorm for some rest. See you all in Defence Against the Dark Arts this afternoon," Ethan said, wiping his mouth and standing up.
"Ethan, are you… alright?" Ron asked cautiously.
"What do you mean? I'm perfectly fine," Ethan replied, clearly confused.
"No, you're acting far too normal, which makes it seem very abnormal," Hermione frowned suspiciously. "Weren't you just depressed about your Transfiguration essays?"
"Oh, that. I've already figured out how to handle it," Ethan replied casually, stepping over the bench and preparing to leave.
Everyone: ???
That fast? Did you stop time, or did we skip a chapter here?
"Wait, Ethan, don't push yourself too hard—it's not an easy assignment," Fred quickly warned him.
"Exactly. If you're really struggling, you can always ask Percy—he's brilliant at Transfiguration," George suggested helpfully.
"If you fail to hand in your homework because you're trying to show off, Professor McGonagall will turn you into a human statue and display you at the classroom door."
Ethan turned around and flashed everyone a mysterious, knowing smile.
"My friends, have you ever heard of padding your word count?"
---
Defence Against the Dark Arts was a core subject at Hogwarts. In this class, students learned how to defend themselves against various forms of dark magic, including dark creatures, curses, hexes, and jinxes.
By all rights, such an exciting and mysterious subject should have had everyone eager and attentive.
Unfortunately, Professor Quirrell's lesson turned into a joke almost immediately.
As soon as they stepped into the Defence classroom, everyone instinctively covered their noses.
"Merlin's pants! What's with the garlic smell? Is Quirrell secretly from some garlic-loving region?" Ethan groaned, pinching his nose and rolling his eyes.
"Rumor has it he's scared of a vampire he encountered in Romania. He's afraid it'll track him down and attack him," Ron explained indistinctly, both nostrils plugged with wads of tissue paper.
"Your paper plugs look way better than my hand. Got any more?" Ethan asked hopefully.
"Sure, I've got extra. Harry, want some?"
"S-students, p-please quiet d-down," Professor Quirrell suddenly appeared at the front of the classroom, stuttering anxiously as he gestured for silence. "W-we'll b-begin class n-now. Please t-turn your textbooks to…"
Barely a few sentences into the lesson, Professor Quirrell's topic abruptly shifted from methods of defending against dark creatures to boasting shamelessly about himself. He claimed the large turban wrapped around his head was a gift from an African prince, who had given it to him as thanks for helping fend off an Inferius attack.
Of course, no one truly believed his extravagant tale.
"Professor, how exactly did you defeat the Inferius?" Seamus impatiently interrupted, his curiosity piqued.
"I-I-I… er… that… w-well…" Professor Quirrell turned beet-red and quickly mumbled something vague about the weather instead.
"Sigh…" Ethan, seated at the back of the room, sighed dramatically, turning to Harry and Ron beside him. "Is it just me, or am I starting to feel like even I could teach this class better?"
"You don't say. Even I could just read straight from the textbook and do a better job," Hermione surprisingly agreed, openly criticizing Professor Quirrell's teaching for once.
When the bell finally rang, Harry and the other first-years bolted from the room as quickly as possible, leaving only Ethan behind to endure more garlic torture.
"M-Mr. Ethan, let's s-start your extra lessons now," Professor Quirrell stammered nervously.
"Of course, Professor. What will we be covering exactly?" Ethan responded with an awkward yet polite professional smile.
"W-well, let's b-begin with something s-simple—the Levitation Spell. Easy to cast, and can briefly s-suspend an enemy in midair. Many underestimate it as overly basic, b-but that is their mistake," Professor Quirrell raised his wand. "Allow me to demonstrate."
"Levioso."
The practice dummy in the room immediately floated into the air.
"S-simple yet effective, y-you see."
After only a brief practice session, Ethan quickly mastered the spell, easily making the dummy float and hover at will.
"V-very impressive, Mr. Ethan, you're m-making excellent progress," Professor Quirrell praised uneasily, glancing anxiously at his pocket watch every few seconds.
"Professor, if you have something urgent, feel free to leave. I can practice by myself," Ethan offered helpfully.
"T-then I'll t-take my leave. G-goodbye, Mr. Ethan," Professor Quirrell blurted out quickly, looking immensely relieved as he hurried out of the Defence classroom.
"Who exactly is the teacher here?" Ethan sighed, shaking his head as he flicked his wand casually at the dummy.
"Flipendo."
The dummy flipped end-over-end into the air, spinning gracefully under Ethan's control.